


Walk the Line

by Batkatbrown



Category: Overwatch (Video Game), overwatch
Genre: Bottom Jesse McCree, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Medium Burn, Paying for affection, Sexual Tension, Slow Romance, Stripper Hanzo, Strippers & Strip Clubs, Top Hanzo Shimada, touch starved
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-17
Updated: 2018-12-26
Packaged: 2019-02-16 01:53:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 23,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13044057
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Batkatbrown/pseuds/Batkatbrown
Summary: His shoulders set, face stormy and every line of his body extending to show the raw power barely contained and controlled. The talking died out for a blessed moment and it was just him, his breathing and the music.A thunderous rumble of drums and he reached high on the poll and lifted himself off the ground with a single arm. His act was one of strength, working groups of muscle with precision and intent.Hanzo set the trap with his body, enticing the cowboy hat-wearing man in the front of the crowd. It would be all too easy to trick him into taking Hanzo home tonight. Jesse would wake drugged, his home robbed and his pride bruised.Except there is something different about Jesse that almost makes Hanzo change his mind...





	1. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A huge thanks goes out to Kelsey for editing this chapter! And to my discord for enabling me to write guilty pleasures like this.
> 
> tw: some casual racism from the club  
> tw: some casual homophobia

Music pumped through the club, a heavy beat with too much bass. The speakers on either side of the stage vibrated to the song, strapped in place to keep them from walking away from the noise. Magenta bathed the polished wood of the stage and silver pole in pulsating pools that dared the crowd to dip a toe in.

Hanzo watched with detached disgust at the patrons filling the gentlemen's club on the bustling friday night. Safe from the fervor of groping hands and sticky sweet drinks, he waited for his turn at the stage at the far back. Head to toe black clothes hid him in the deep shadows. 

A smoke hung from his lips as he scrolled through his phone. There was another job tomorrow if he wanted it. Private party in the Industry Zone of Sunset City. Sure to have more than a handful of men with more money than dick. It would be easy enough to make his rent for that month, if he could bare to look at himself after.

He declined, unwilling to risk a mass murder if the ‘gentlemen’ turned into attackers. It happened from time to time in this line of work. He had the skills to take care of himself and more besides.

Tonight was not about the hundreds, twenties and ones shoved into his tiny black and mesh shorts. 

“See the new party that just came in?” Genji asked from the shadows beside him. Dressed in a black velvet bunny leotard and fishnets, he was the fetishists dream of a hairless, demure asian.

Hanzo followed his brother’s pointing finger, scanning the five men taking up the big roller booth right in front to the stage. ‘The Splash Zone,’ as it was unofficially known, practically guaranteed a free squeeze or grind. Drops of sweat were flung from the performers to the disgust or delight of the clientele.

It was a standard assortment of men in their thirties. All flashy watches and cheap shoes with something raw and ugly written on their faces. They laughed at the dancers and threw ones by the handful without the decency of a smile or wink.

“Straight?”

“Yup,” Genji confirmed. He wriggled and shimmied his hips to dig out a ten from the bottom of his leotard. 

Hanzo kept his eyes carefully on the crowd. The man in the middle was different, his watch was still polished to a golden glimmer but the pocket square in his suit jacket was perfectly pressed. And a desperate, shameful hunger blazed in his eyes like beacons.

“Not that one.”

“Closet.”

“Perfect.” Hanzo rolled his head and cracked his knuckles. Wiggling each finger to get the blood flowing as a young twink strutted off the stage. The closeted ones were the easiest targets and the most eager to pay for him.

The lights shifted to a deep blue and the music edged to rolling strings. There was a decidedly ‘asian’ lilt to it that drove him insane but he would be done with this club soon enough. He did not swing his hips or shimmy in the way the others often did. No, he had a special kind of energy.

His shoulders set, face stormy and every line of his body extending to show the raw power barely contained and controlled. The talking died out for a blessed moment and it was just him, his breathing and the music.

A thunderous rumble of drums and he reached high on the poll and lifted himself off the ground with a single arm. His act was one of strength, working groups of muscle with precision and intent. 

He moved into a flag position, body shooting out horizontally from the poll. Holding it for three breathes, he found solace in the power of his body. It made it easier to ignore the screaming and whistles.

Slowly exhaling, he parted his legs and twisted up to bring his crotch to the disgustingly warm metal. Dollar bills whispered on his skin and slid off his powerful back to the stage floor. Flowing to the beat of the music, he worked his hips against the poll, grinding in a wicked rut.

A piece of his attention was always on the man in the middle of the vip booth. His companions were laughing over watered down whiskey and the flash of a phone nearly blinded him.

He fell out of the position on the poll to shift to one that left his right arm free. Spiraling lazily, he found the release tab on the panel of mesh that ran down his waist and peeled off the black shirt. The lights flooded purple and white, flashing over the intricate dragon that spiraled down his arm from his pec to wrist. His regulars screamed and one woman stood up clapping.

Hanzo smiled at her charming enthusiasm. She was always respectful and kept her hands to herself during the rare lapdance.

He resumed dancing with a mechanical kind of energy, not truly enjoying it anymore. He was not even hard despite the attention. His head was clear as he finished his main set and looked to the dj. 

“Now we got a real nice treat,” the booming voice cut through the music and screams went up all around. “It’s a special man’s birthday and his friends have pitched in to buy him a lapdance from our own Haku! Let’s give the birthday boy a round of applause.”

 

-

 

“Henry, you fucking bastard,” Jesse snarled as the spotlight went to him. It danced in the sweat beaded on his face and neck. The suit was too hot and he loosened his bolo tie. “This isn’t fucking funny. I ain’t going through--”

“It’s fucking hilarious,” the man closest to him snickered. “And we already paid for it. No refunds.” he pointed to the tacky neon sign to their left.

“I shoulda never told ya it was m’birthday.” Jesse’s teeth hurt from clenching and he kept his eyes firmly on the edge of the stage. He refused to let himself be tortured like this. He had made the mistake of saying, just once, over drinks to his coworkers, that he was lonely. And this is how they repaid his bit of honesty? He would have hated a straight strip club just as much but at least he wouldn’t have had to worry about getting a hard on.

Shame burned his ears and scorched the back of his neck as the club’s attention pinned him to the spot. In another time, he might have heated with excitement but now, he just wanted to get away.

“What is your name?”

A voice like a summer’s night sky caressed him intimately, dark and husky and crisp with the faint curl of a smirk.

Jesse looked up, eyes following the river of shimmering skin. His throat thickened and he coughed when he tried to answer. Fiscated by the curve of muscles in the man’s thighs and trim waist. How glorious it would feel to have Haku between his legs, all power and might.

“His name’s Jesse McCree!” Kyle kindly offered when McCree was unable to find his voice. “He’s ‘lonely’. Can’t you cheer him up?”

“Perhaps, for the right price.” 

One of those glorious hands shifted into his field of vision and Jesse found his chin tipped up. “Howdy,” he rasped, eyes flying over the solid brick of muscle standing in front of him. Saliva flooded his mouth at the sight of the man’s perfect dusky nipples and he managed to clear his throat a little. “You dun have t’do this. They’re just having fun at my expense.” 

Jesse started to dig in his back pocket, using it as an excuse to drop his eyes back to the floor. Stray wisps of hair fell out of his low ponytail and stuck in the sweat beading on his face and neck.

“Hmm...Perhaps you would feel more comfortable celebrating in one of our private booths?” Hanzo murmured, his words dripped into Jesse’s ear like honey. He shivered, hot thick desire throbbing between his legs. He hunched quickly, fumbling to pull out a stack of twenties. 

He was ready to pay the dancer to just go away. To leave him in peace so he could run out the front door and head for the safety of his loft. Instead, before he could get the plea out, Hanzo took his wrist and guided his hand to velvet soft skin of his hip. Jesse froze as the need simmering in his core burst into a boil. 

Every nerve screamed for him to spread his hand and hold as much flesh as he could. Desperate for the warmth of a welcoming touch, tears swam to his eyes. He fought them down, stricken as Hanzo didn’t push him away.

No touching was the rule. Except when thrusting bills into his tiny shorts. He shook as everything else whited out. The hooting and hollering of his coworkers, the cheering encouragement from the crowd, the heavy music, it all faded away in the face of the texture of the man’s hip.

He brushed a thumb over the sharp line of muscle, scooping up a beat of sweat. He ached to taste it, to fall at his feet and kiss every inch of skin exposed to the sticky hot air. 

“I will give you the birthday discount. Come with me.” 

“Yessir,” Jesse whispered, the sound doubtlessly lost to all but the man standing so close.

The dancer hummed in response and when Jesse found he couldn’t move, grabbed his elbow firmly. “There is no need to be shy.” 

Jesse gulped, pleading that his co-workers wouldn’t think to check if he had a raging erection because there was no hiding it at this point. Gratefully Haku lead the way, his grip firm on his arm and completely in control. 

Jesse barely noticed the tacky art on the hallway walls, or the way each door and frame was decorated in a different theme or kink. He focused on his heartbeat, trying to slow it down and not scream for Haku to touch him more. Anywhere, even a hand on his shoulder, fingers in his hair, he would take whatever scraps of intimacy he could have.

The door clicked shut behind him and a gust of air flew out of him. His shoulders sagged and he half crumpled into the plush blue velvet couch. A near hysterical laugh bubbled up and he clamped his jaw shut to keep it inside. He was in a private room with a man made up of pure beef that was paid to touch him.

Jesse squeezed his eyes shut as Haku leaned close. 

“Tell me, what do you desire, Jesse McCree?” 

Jesse struggled to find his voice, not daring to open his eyes to the slice of unattainable heaven in front of him. “Just… just touch me. Please.”

A dark laugh bubbled up and filled the room, sending Jesse’s head swimming. “As you wish.” The line was spoken like a charm or maybe a warding spell and Jesse followed it with a curse. Everything going hazy as Hanzo straddled him, thick powerful ass settled right over his obvious need.

“You may touch me. You are allowed to cum when you wish.” Haku’s words, spoken as if from a recording, cooled some of the fire inside him.

Jesse blinked away the lust enough to look up and hiss with wonder. Hanzo’s cheek bones were carved from marble in the sultry blue light. The proud arch of his nose cast a slash of shadow over his face and Jesse was struck by both.

He carefully settled his hands on Haku’s hips, thumbs brushing the smooth skin of his side. It seemed to amuse the dancer and he rolled his body in a fluid line. It forced a cry out of Jesse’s mouth and he twitched at the long stroke on his cock. Hanzo’s hips settled against his thick chest and torso, fucking up against his pecs.

“You’re soft.” The words popped out of his mouth and his own began to shrink. 

  
  


-

 

Hanzo stilled, lips parted in a silent ‘Oh’ of surprise. He had not expected the man to be able to think of anything other than how badly he needed to get off. The bulge was impressive nestled between his cheeks. Promising that if the client paid to go all the way, Hanzo would hurt for days.

“I…” Hanzo reached for something to say but came up empty. He looked away and crossed his arms. There was no need for him to care what this man said. What did it even matter if he was hard or not, Jesse was and that’s all that mattered in this line of work. 

Though, even now, the man below him was softening. He ground lightly over Jesse’s lap, trying to get it back.

Iron hands locked him in place, tender where thumbs rested on his hip bones. But there was no moving further. Fear shot down his spine and he shoved away. Standing was better, not being touched by someone that was not interested in him.

“Why do you do this?”

Hanzo’s face scrunched in confusion. “What do you mean?”

“This… all of this. You ain’t... “

“I am a stripper, I give clients what they want.” Hanzo spit the words, tasting their vileness. He was only a dancer to pay for his and Genji’s needs until they could get on their feet. Leaving the Shimada clan had been harder than they thought, but soon enough he would have them to the next city and the next mark.

Jesse was quiet, not moving to grab him again. The plan could still work. Though he might need more than one session to tempt the man into inviting him back to his home. The watch on his wrist was worth about three thousand at a fence. It’d get them out of town and Jesse would never go to the police about a male stripper stealing everything not nailed down in his home.

“You do… whatever they want?”

Hanzo sneered down at the man. Perhaps it would not take so long after all. “There are a few hard limits, but yes.” He tilted his head to the side, letting his bangs fall in front of his face. Trying to soften some of himself, to lure the fool into giving him the way in he needed. Most men couldn’t reason with their cock in someone’s mouth.

“Let me hold you.”

“Very well.” He started to tug his shorts down, not opposed to a stranger stroking his cock. They were always surprised by its size and girth.

“No.”

Hanzo shivered as Jesse’s broad hand wrapped so gently around his wrist. Roughened by hard work and yet light as a hummingbird, Jesse eased his hand to his side. 

“Just… let me hold you. Please.”

Something painful twisted in his chest but he let Jesse guide him close. He was not prepared for the tender embrace, wrapped up in strong arms. He shifted on Jesse’s thigh, finding a comfortable place and let the man ease his head to the soft, firm pillow of his shoulder. A rich, bright scent eased over him, like cinnamon and oranges and he found himself tucking his face just a bit closer. 

He felt Jesse swallow against his forehead. Tilting his ear slightly, he could hear Jesse’s heartbeat. It was slowing down from a gallop to something steady and calm. Hanzo found himself struggling not to give in to the simple joy of a hug.

It wouldn't do either of them any good if Hanzo softened. 

He remained firm and resolute over the next few weeks. Jesse would come in on random nights, sometimes staying in the back and sometimes close enough to press bills into his chest. Just to steal a quick touch, even if it was only a brush of finger tips along the hollows of his abs before leaving.

They did not talk again, not more than a few words exchanged flippantly and the businessman didn’t buy a private hour. 

There were other marks in the meantime. Fools that thought a few extra hundreds could buy them access to his body. They were left drugged and passed out in bed while Hanzo filled his bag with their secret vices. He had just finished handing over an eightball of coke to his fence when he got a text from the club.

[Jesse is looking for you]

[I will be there in twenty.]

Jesse was not how Hanzo expected at the club, let into a semi private room so they could hear each other over the music. Jesse’s wallet lighter for the privilege. Hanzo would not see more than a few twenties for his cut and it soured his gut. He worked and sweated and let filthy men touch him for a pittance of what the club made off him. He made far more with his other nighttime activities.

Hanzo watched Jesse swirl his whiskey, the amber liquid flash different colors under the lights. The man was dressed down today. A loose button down flowed over his shoulders and powerful arms, tucked into vintage Levi’s and cowboy boots that had seen their share of hard work.

“How… have you been?” Jesse’s hesitant words drew Hanzo’s attention back to his mouth.

A fine cut mouth at that, framed by a shaggier beard than before. It suited him. “I will need to return to work soon.” 

Jesse could make of that what he wanted.

“Are you… happy here?”

Hanzo’s lip curled reflexively before he could school his face. “It is an adequate place of employment. Though I am open to… extracurricular affairs.”

“Oh.” Jesse fiddled with his cowboy hat, working the rim through his fingers bit by bit. “Well… maybe this is gonna be a fool’s request then but I was…thinking that I might hire you.”

“For the right price.” Hanzo crossed his arms, holding down a gleeful snicker.

“Now, I don’t mean t’have sex with you. Just to get that clear.”

“Of course.” Hanzo resisted rolling his eyes. They all said that. At first.

“But I… I am lonely. I don’t have no real friends here and I… I mighty enjoyed just holding you in my arms.”

“I am free tonight.”

“No… shit, I’m sorry. You make me mighty nervous.” Jesse put his head into his hand, hiding some of the red. Hanzo tried not to notice how cute and flushed his ear tips were. “I want t’hire you as a personal assistant. A live-in assistant, even. I just… fuck. I want you t’live with me and let me hold you and I’ll pay you. Whatever you make here I’ll double it.”

Hanzo studied the table between them, his own drink of sake untouched. It was not the first proposition he had gotten though this was by far the most sincere sounding. He was almost tempted to believe it. More likely, Jesse would try to lure him into seclusion and traffic him. Or lock him up in some dungeon as his personal fuck doll.

Except Hanzo wasn’t some hapless dancer without a way to defend himself. He could make it work for his own gain.

“Six thousand a month. Cash.”

“Done.”

Hanzo raised his gaze to Jesse’s, for a moment falling into the hopeful, eager brown pools. They promised warmth and affection and nothing but good things but Hanzo knew better. He shook the stars from his eyes and extended his hand.

“You have a deal, Jesse McCree.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Unbeta'd so please forgive my errors

Hanzo sighed around a cigarette in the tiny shared apartment on the southside of Sunset City. The smoke curled lazily around the broken ceiling fan and added to the stains already littered there.

“Do you have to smoke in here?” Genji moaned from the couch.

“The windows don’t open.”

“Ugh.”

Hanzo stubbed the cigarette out on the bottom of his heavy boot. He tucked the cig into the pack and stowed it in his jacket pocket. His things were spread out on the coffee table and he shoved Genji’s legs out of the way to sit down.

“Got everything?”

A soft hum made up his response as he inventoried his supplies and put each item into the black duffle bag. Silky crimson red rope joined a set of handcuffs and a hefty bottle of lube and stack of condoms on top of his uniform of black on black on black clothes.

“Don’t forget the backup battery for the skimmer.”

“Ah, you are correct.” Hanzo rose to find the little battery pack and slipped it into the inside pocket next to the skimmer. The assorted tools of his true trade were hidden away for after Jesse was panting and begging tied up in his own bed.

“You think of just… playing the long game?” Genji didn’t look up from his phone.

“Perhaps.” Hanzo sighed, allowing himself a moment to hope that Jesse was perhaps as honorable as he claimed. They could do worse than live on six thousand cash a month in exchange for taking notes and scheduling meetings.

_ And letting him touch me.  _ Hanzo snorted at the thought of something as pure and innocent as a companionable hold. There was no time for such childish considerations. 

“Just saying… if it’s safe…” Genji shrugged. “Wouldn’t mind benefiting from your hard work.”

“I have no doubt.” 

Genji looked up and stuck his tongue out. “What? That leotard chaffs my balls-”

Hanzo cuffed him upside the head. “Do not tell me such things.” But they shared a laugh and knowing look. There were things they chose not to discuss about their current occupations. Hanzo left the tiny living room to their shared closet. The door always stuck and he wrestled it open with a low grunt of hesitation.

A display of highly illegal paraphernalia waited him behind their clothes. The arsenal contained everything the two heirs could need: untraceable handguns, knives, tiny vials of specific knockup drugs and surveillance equipment. 

Hanzo hesitated with his hand on a glock before slowly switching to a thin knife. Not much bigger than his middle finger, he was easy to conceal and easy to slip between a man’s ribs. The big cowboy did not seem the type he would need to subdue with force but he was not a man to take chances.

He was going to be late if he didn’t finish soon.

“You can always call me if you need me,” Genji murmured as they stood at the door to the shithole. 

“I know.” Hanzo smiled softly at his little brother. They had made it through hell to get here. They would make it to the other side.

Genji wrapped him up in a hug, squeezing until his ribs groaned and his toes left the floor.

“I hate that you are taller than me.”

“Then grow,” Genji snickered but they parted with knowing looks. Both had jobs to take care of and the apartment would be empty tonight except for ghosts.

Hanzo ignored the tightness in his stomach as he slung his bag over his shoulder and headed to his stripped down motorcycle. It had once been a point of pride and the object of hours of devotion.

Now it looked like a piece of shit, scratched and battered with rust creeping in on the once shiny chrome. The rumble of the engine was as smooth and seductive as ever and the powerful beast between his thighs comforted him.

He patted hidden compartment by his knee before tugging on his helmet and prowling out into the night. A sense of calm began to fall around him as he wove through traffic. This was his favorite part of a mission. It was like standing on the edge of a cliff and choosing to jump into the stormy waters below.

It was his choice to do this.

 

-

 

Jesse rushed around his loft apartment as if it wasn’t spotless already. He still straightened the throw pillows on the couch before heading back into the second home office. It had been meticulously set up over the last week. Everything fresh and clean and shiny thanks to an online shopping spree and carefully nondescript out of consideration to his soon to be guest.

He didn’t dare make a guess to what Haku would like for decoration so he left a gift card to a local boutique on the keyboard. Quickly heading to the bedroom, he set the air freshner to automatically spray every twelve hours and plumped the goosedown pillows.

It was presumptuous to pick out a dark navy comforter with gold trim but his impulse control suffered these days. Without his friends and family around, he admitted to himself he was flailing.

_ Need to find a new therapist. _ He chewed on the inside of his lip, a bad habit from his childhood that had crept up on him. He longed he could have stayed in vibrant Santa Fe. He had barely been here three months and he was already itching to go home and see his mama and sister. 

Easing the bolo tie around his neck, he left to wait in the living room. There was nothing left for him to do to prepare. He wasn’t sure if he really wanted Haku to show up or not.  _ What would Mama think of me… _ he sighed and began to pace in front of the windows.

The city winked at him from the floor to ceiling windows facing west. 

Like stars in a vast desert night sky, it was cold and empty.

Jesse rubbed his scruffy jaw despite having a fancy shaving kit under the bathroom sink. It was too much hassle to keep clean shaven and the beard trend was in full boom. Even in the typically uptight antiquities trade which had brought him here. The museum he was currently working with to acquire a new exhibit of pre-Omnic War paintings from Zurich had paid for his relocation and continued position on staff. He had easily found employment at the local University as an Art History Professor to keep his nights full.

It did nothing for the gaping hole in his chest.

The doorbell broke him out of his musings and he was quick to spring to his feet. His heart thundered against his ribs like a jackrabbit as he rushed to the door. Sweat beaded on his forehead and he swiped it off with his sleeve. 

The dark button down hid the evidence of his stress and he tried to collect himself with one hand on the doorknob. He barely managed to get himself under control, pushing away the anxiety of having a male stripper about to come into his home. Someone that could kick his ass six ways to sunday and probably murder him with just a look coming to live with him.

_ What the fuck was I thinking? _

A knock forced him to act and he yanked the door open too hard. 

Haku jumped, fist still raised for another knock.

“Shit, sorry,” Jesse fumbled for his words. “I mean, Howdy.”

A cold shiver raced down Jesse’s spine as the man calmly examined him. There was not a hair out of place despite the motorcycle helmet tucked under one arm. The leather jacket stretched over Haku’s broad shoulders and hugged the solid column of muscle that was his waist.

“Greetings.” Hanzo’s face remained unreadable. “My apologies. I am late.”

“Ain’t no thing.” Jesse stepped to the side and waved the man in from the hall. The woman who lived down the hall on the opposite side paused with her keys in hand, watching the scene unfold. “Please c’mon in.”

Hanzo nodded, his eyes darting to the spectator before a devilish smile dripped from his lips. It sent Jesse’s head spinning and he gulped to collect himself, still amazed he was going to do this. Even if he wasn’t going to let Hanzo shove him down and fuck him till he was raw and screaming, he was still getting himself tangled up in something sure to end badly.

“Shoes off?”

“Uh, yes please,” Jesse rubbed the back of his neck as he spoke. His own shoes were set by the door and Hanzo crouched to unlace his heavy leather boots. “Try t’keep the place clean, always feel guilty fer dirtyin’ up a space I’m only rentin’.”

Hanzo raised a hand and Jesse felt the words dry up in his chest. He longed to capture those strong thick fingers and press them to his cheek. Instead, Jesse watched Haku toe off his shoes and set them with care next to his own.

“Let me take your bag.” He reached for the duffle but Hanzo was faster. Lightning struck Jesse, fusing him to the spot as Hanzo’s easily restrained his wrist. The touch burned through his shirt and his toes curled despite the danger. Maybe because of the danger sharp and clear in Haku’s eyes.

“Sorry.” He worked some moisture in his mouth. “I can show ya to your room, Haku.”

The man considered him before slowly releasing his grip. His hand fell to his side and Jesse resisted the urge to rub where it had been.

“Do not touch me without permission.”

“Yessir.” Jesse gulped down the rush of ache and longing after a moment. “This way. Hope you like it. You wanna change anything, go right ahead, I ain’t gonna be offended or nothing.” 

Jesse lead the way through the open concept apartment to the bedrooms. Their doors opposing each other with a massive bathroom between that they would both share. “Just through there. I’ll let you get settled in then. I’m just gonna put on some pajamas and grab my laptop and work in the living room for a bit? I’ll order some food if you’re hungry later.”

 

-

 

Hanzo allowed himself a smile once Jesse had left. There was something almost disarming about him and a softness he hadn’t seen before. It was doubtlessly an act to set him at ease or at the very least the man’s best behavior at the beginning of their agreement.

He took his time to scan the room for cameras and bugs but it came up clean.  _ Strange. _ He rubbed his neatly trimmed jaw and double checked to be sure. The scan didn’t discover anything and he reluctantly concluded that the room was private. It would be the first time. Voyeur porn was a popular category and a businessman like Jesse was a fool to not capitalize on the arrangement. 

Hanzo planted his own surveillance, a micro camera to record the entire room, another aimed at the jack and jill style bathroom’s door and a third looking out the window to the small balcony. 

The bathroom itself was clean as well, both from surveillance and dust. He noticed a black robe on Jesse’s side of the room and a blue one on his own. He left his toiletry bag on his side of the sink with the end with the camera in it pointed at Jesse’s door.

Satisfied with his setup to collect blackmail if needed, Hanzo retreated to his room and changed into skin tight black leggings and a workout tank. He swept his hair back into a ponytail and tied it off neatly with a hairband.

He glanced at the bottle of lube on the nightstand table and the series of glass plugs.  _ I should stretch _ , he chewed his lip as he considered it. It would be faster to let Jesse fuck him once and flip the tables the next time. 

But what if Jesse was sincere? What if he could actually make six thousand a month in exchange for being a secretary and substitute plush animal?

He let himself into the main part of the loft on silent feet. Padding across the polished wood floor to the couch. The back of Jesse’s neck was pink under the richness of his skin and the tips of his ears were red. 

A cooking show played softly on a massive tv opposite the couch. It was just enough to cover the clicking of Jesse’s typing. The man didn’t look up as he approached and Hanzo smirked at the chance to catch him off guard.

Something cruel inside him suggested he could knock him out and rob him blind right now. He deserved the punishment for trusting a stranger. For being so pathetic as to buy him as if he was not a dragon. 

“You’re welcome t’join me. Iffa you want?”

 

\--

 

Jesse watched Haku jump in the reflection on his laptop screen without looking away. “Sorry.” he quickly twisted to look over his shoulder. “Didn’t mean t’spook you.”

Haku scoffed and crossed his arms over his chest. His shirt seemed to strain over the swell of his biceps and Jesse’s mouth went dry.

“What are you working on?” Haku’s face was impassive. Except for a light pink on his cheeks that tempered the coldness in his voice.

“Writin’ up a lesson plan.” Jesse shifted his weight as his uncrossed his leg from his knee.

“You are a teacher?” Haku slowly came to the right side of the couch.

Jesse quickly looked away, cursing the way the leggings hugged every hard line of muscle in Haku’s legs. He didn’t want his dick trying to take control just because he was lonely and frustrated. 

“Art History.”

“Hmm.”

“Nothing fancy mind you. Seems like I might as well work as much as I can. Don’t really have…” Jesse trailed off as Haku settled beside him, not touching. A painful ache made it impossible to breath for a long moment. Every inch of his skin tingled to life and begged to just be held by someone.

“I have studied art history in my homeland.” 

“Really? Was it general art history or something more specific? And--” Jesse took a careful breath. “--You mind me asking where you from? Don’t wanna offend by taking a guess.”

“Guess.” Haku’s mouth quirked up slightly in one corner.

“Nah, I know when somethings a trap.” Jesse laughed with a shake of his head. “How bout you give me a hint?”

Haku considered, head tilted to the side and a hand drifting to the cushion between their thighs. “Depth is handled differently then in western art.”

“Ah…” Jesse narrowed his eyes suspiciously. “You’re not taking it easy on me now are you?”

Haku merely raised an eyebrow. “I do not plan to make anything easy.”

Heat charged up Jesse’s cheeks and he was the first to look away. 

“During a period of my people’s history, intricate paintings of gardens were in demand.”

“Got it.” Jesse sat up straight, shoulders relaxing away from his ears. “You are Japanese. The  Muromachi period is one of my favorites. Buddism was becoming popular and--” Jesse cut himself off with a shake of his head. “Course you dun need me tellin’ you about your own history.”

“You are correct. I am Japanese. I have only recently come to the states in fact.”

“Really? Shit, you coulda fooled me. You speak better english than me probably. Least with this accent,” he pointed a finger to his mouth with a foolish grin. “Used t’live in Santa Fe but before that we lived in Georgia. Accent just stuck.”

“I have… been transient with my brother for some time.”

“Yeah? Roadtripping?” Jesse could feel the edges of something sharp and dangerous in the conversation.

“Something like that.”

“Been to see the World’s Biggest Tumbleweed yet?”

Haku blinked at him, slightly pulling back. “The biggest Tumbleweed.”

Jesse relaxed into the arm of the couch, half twisting to face Haku. “You know, tourist attractions. This town has quite a few, all ridiculous and unconfirmed of course.”

From there the conversation rolled smoothly. Jesse tentatively pitching softballs and Hanzo stepping up to the plate to take a swing. He could sense the walls around the man and something far more complex than he had originally thought.

It was like a painting, so many layers of thought and significance and iconography Jesse had yet to learn. He remembered not to touch without permission and it was becoming easier to ignore the longing. Just having someone else close was almost enough to sooth it.

Their meandering conversation eventually settled into safer territory as they browsed netflix together. A pizza filled up the coffee table along with empty beers for Jesse and a mug of coffee for Hanzo as the hour ticked towards midnight.

“No way, no horror,” Jesse shuddered and quickly clicked away from the category. “How about a documentary?”

 

\--

 

“I do not wish to be put to sleep,” Hanzo chuckled and leaned over the man to steal the remote. His fingers brushed along Jesse’s and he pretended not to notice the sharp intake of breath. Jesse was frozen and Hanzo took full advantage to flick back to the horror category and scroll through them.

“Not that one,” Jesse’s face scrunched up as Hanzo hovered over The Grudge. “Shit scared the piss outta me in highschool.”

“Hmm.” Hanzo flicked past it. “How do you feel about subtitles?”

“Gotta admit i’m a little too buzzed and…” Jesse put a hand over his head and then at the collar of his shirt. “Don’t have my glasses.”

Hanzo tucked that information away for another time. “Next time.” He frowned at the screen as he went through the selection. “Creature Feature?”

Jesse visibly relaxed next to him. “I like those, long as it’s not supernatural and possession that stuff. Don’t mess with that.”

Hanzo nodded, taking it into consideration as he settled on a classic. “Have you seen Alien before?”

“Uh, I dun think so? It’s pretty old isn’t it?”

Hanzo tisked and turned to Jesse with a disapproving look. “It is a classic. And there are at least half a dozen in the series.”

“You suggesting a marathon?” 

The breath went out of his lungs as the sweetest, most hopeful smile broke over the man’s face. Overwhelming his cheeks and eyes and twinkling in their depths, it was so sincere Hanzo almost felt guilty for what he was planning on doing to Jesse.

“Tomorrow is Saturday.” He pointed out, turning away to hide the guilt on his face. He tugged a throw blanket free and into his lap to ward off the chill. “Besides, if you get scared… you may hide your face in my shoulder.”

 


	3. Chapter 3

Jesse jumped far sooner than he should have but his nerves strained like cords about to snap. The slow creeping atmosphere of horror welled up and surrounded him in the pitch black apartment. It was only the glow of the screen and the rattle of harsh conversation.

He didn’t mean to lean into Haku. His pride was strong enough to tell himself that at least but as the facehugger lunged at Ridley's face he broke. Ducking his face against Haku’s shoulder brought a flush of relief and he watched out of the corner of his eye.

“Acid blood? Are you fucking kidding me?” he shuddered at the thought of it burning through him. Haku’s arm tensed under his cheek and Jesse began to pull back instantly. The tightness broke into a laugh as Haku struggled to suppress his amusement.

“Asshole,” Jesse grunted but was quick to rest his head on the man’s shoulder again. It was so warm and firm and solid he could barely breathe when he let himself focus on it. Haku’s shrug did little to dislodge him.

It was late, far later than he normally stayed up but the adrenaline of the movie had him nervously jiggling his foot and bouncing his leg. He flinched as another member of the crew went down with an agonizing scream. Swallowing reflexively as that horrible thing shoved it’s spewer down the man’s throat and _impregnated_ him with another alien.

He really did not enjoy the horror genre as a whole, at least not after what he had been through. “I regret agreeing to this already.”

“It gets better.”

Jesse groaned and used the motion to disguise a deep sniff of Haku’s shoulder. Smoke and ash blended perfectly in his nose with the tang of musky bathwash. It made his mouth water and his chest clench painfully as if he had one of those nasty little fuckers writhing around inside him already.

Every cell ached for more.

He didn’t dare do more than steal another sniff and turn his face back to the screen. Their arms just barely brushed from shoulder to elbow. It was awkward to move and a stilted position to remain in as the second movie began to play.

“You may put your arm around me.” Haku chuckled as the title came up on the screen as if sensing the crick starting in Jesse’s neck already.

“Really? Don’t mean to--” his words dried up in his throat and were blown away by a heavy breath as Haku casually picked up his hand and dropped Jesse’s left arm over his shoulders.  “O-oh.”

He swallowed hard and had to wash his stupid needy impulses down with a deep draw of beer. It was thankfully strong enough to lull some of the anxiety and he wiped his mouth on the back of his hand.

“Haven’t done this in… in years.”

“Watched a marathon?” Haku asked with an arched brow are Ridley was debriefed in a medical room.

Jesse just shrugged and looked away. He wasn’t out to anyone. Not even his family. The last his ma and sister knew, he’d been with Sarah for six months and she was suppose to have followed him here. Instead she’d left him at the airport with a goodbye kiss and a sad smile.

He couldn’t blame her. The night before he’d gotten blackout drunk to try to sleep with her and ended up making her cry in expensive lingerie. He hoped she was happier. Wherever she was in the world.

It was hard to feel demoralized when Haku leaned just a little into him. A wall of solid muscle and strength that somehow just fit so perfectly he wanted to cry. His fingers hovered over the strong curve of his breast, not daring to fully settle as the movie played out. He should have been following better this time now that there wasn’t a poor cat being threatened.

Instead all of his attention was focused on the blessed strip of contact from their knees and up his thigh to his side as Haku got comfortable. His powerful legs stretched out and for a moment hovered over the coffee table.

“Go ahead, i don’t mind.” Jesse propped one socked foot up in example and after a moment, Haku followed suit. It made it easier to for the smaller man to lean into him. A solid weight that made Jesse bite down a prayer, for strength and for forgiveness all at once.

His mind filled with flashes of Haku over him, using all that impressive muscle to hold him down. What he wouldn’t give for Haku to just take control and open him up slow and deep with those gorgeous calloused fingers until he was crying into the pillow for relief.

“Stop this.”

Jesse jumped as Haku’s hand settled firmly on his thigh, just above his knee. It burned through his pajama pants and he shuddered at the brush of Haku’s thumb against the sensitive edge of his knee. The offending limb continued to bounce nervously.

“Sorry. It’s kinda involuntary.”

“Hm.”

Haku squeezed harder and pressed down to root his heel with the floor. He couldn’t have moved if he wanted; he was transfixed as muscles flex and ripple down Haku’s forearm. Each vein and carved line of sinew was thrown into stark contrast by the light of the screen and poetry bloomed in Jesse’s mind and dripped into his chest.

Drops of sunlight, they watered the pitiful shriveled desert inside him till he was dizzy. His leg stopped moving, even when Haku eased the pressure and he stared at it. The muscle was still wound so tight it almost hurt.

“Sorry… I just… really don’t wanna do something stupid and scare you off.” He admitted into a silence between screams and gunfire.  “Guess i’m nervous enough for both of us.”

 

-

 

Hanzo sat on the edge of his bed as the clock ticked towards three in the morning. A hand over his mouth stifled the cries welling up in his mouth. They dripped between the gaps of his fingers and fell to floor between his feet.

His toes curled and he kicked against the hard tile and tightened his grip on his leaking cock. Breaths gusted hot and heavy over his knuckles and he threw himself back on the bed. Jesse’s face in his mind’s eye, looking so desperate and needy and unguarded. The fucking fool, the gorgeous idiot would regret this in the end. There was no happy ending other than the one Hanzo chased with a fervor in the dark room.

Sweat prickled on his throat and rolled down as he thrust into the tight tunnel of his hands. He shifted and braced his feet on the plush mattress to give himself leverage. He’d been sure this would be a one night stand that left him richer and Jesse smarter but the whole night…

The text messages on his phone blinked at him. Genji doubtlessly yelling encouraging words through the impersonal symbols on the screen. _He didn’t try anything. I will give it another day._ He had sent it to his brother after they hard parted ways with little sweet smile and a promise of breakfast if he wanted it.

Jesse had been eager to tell him he’d acquired several new teas and coffee blends in anticipation of Hanzo’s stay. It was the quiet, tentative nod that Jesse gave him that did him in though, the way his eyes and lingered on Hanzo’s mouth and then lifted to his forehead. The gears obviously turning, weighing and wanting and leaving hanzo with only companionable wave of his hand and turn of his back to head to his own room.

Hanzo had almost followed, just to chase the brief flash of softness and bury himself deep into the unassuming man. He knew Jesse needed it, would take it in heaping gulps like a man dying for air.

Suck his cock like he was born to do it and mewl weakly when Hanzo licked along the cleft of his ass. Those thick thighs would muffle his ears perfectly and squeeze the life out of him. They could crush around his waist and tremble with sweet relief to have what he needed.

The cords inside Hanzo’s gut snapped and he bucked roughly against the sheets as he came. Stars exploded behind his closed eyes, spiraling out thin streaks to fall to the sweaty sheets. He panted and heaved for cool air as he collapsed back onto the bed with sweat dripping down his chest.

It mixed with the cum gathering in the hollows of his abs.

“Idiot,” Hanzo muttered, not sure if he was talking to himself or Jesse.

He was thankful for the balcony as he fished a cigarette out of his bag and dragged on a loose pair of shorts. Hissing when the fabric hit his oversensitive dick, he took a moment to adjust himself and wipe the worst of his mess off with a babywipe from his pack. It wouldn’t replace a shower but it would keep the sheets clean later.

The cold air slapped him in the face and he drank it in. Resting his elbows on the railing, he lit up and drew the burning inside his lungs. It wouldn’t do to get attached to Jesse. To let his guard down could mean his death and yet the prickling desire - curiosity- hadn’t been expelled with his seed.

He chewed the end of the smoke until it was ruined. He stubbed it out and dropped it into a simple terracotta pot where other butts already rested. The balcony was narrow, barely big enough to accommodate the two lawn chairs set up. One was slightly faded from the sunlight and bore a luridly cheerful  _Fighting Coyotes_ logo from the local university across it.

The other was new, still shiny and fresh with creases in the canvas seat and Hano knew without asking that it had been purchased for him. So that he could sit and watch the city with his target.

 _Yes. Think of him as only a target._ He coached himself, sparing a glance for the narrow walkway to where a similar door led into Jesse’s bedroom. He could simply walk down, pick the lock in a few seconds and smother Jesse in his sleep.

Or take the expensives watch and tablet and probably more and simply leave. No one would ever have to know that Jesse had secrets of the flesh he didn’t want the world to know or that Hanzo had blood on his hands.

And cum.

Hanzo looked at a fleck on the back of his hand with disgust and returned to his room to rethink his priorities. It was only the first night after all. As much as his good sense told him to get out now before he was compromised, there were credit cards and bank accounts to be skimmed and blackmail to be gathered and in the end he would be leaving with Genji so what did it matter really.

He cleaned his hands with another wipe before giving up and going into the bathroom to scrub properly. Jesse’s door was slightly ajar and a soft snoring proved the man had been able to fall asleep after all.

It made a small warm thing in Hanzo’s chest to stir.

Let the man sleep.

Hanzo took advantage of the privacy to catalog the rest of the apartment. The tv was too big to move by himself but the the vases on either side were original and worth ten thousand between them. If he could move them but a fence would be wary of such unique pieces. He passed them by and shifted through the cabinets methodically.

A begrudging sense of respect settled on Hanzo’s shoulders as he turned over a Kamikoto chef’s knife. The impeccably balanced Japanese steel practically sang from it’s humble home in the drawer.

The knives would be easier to pawn and he mentally added them to the tally. He could make out with plenty even if it came down to a smash and grab.

Satisfied that his contingency plan would still net a fair amount, Hanzo began to hide three tiny cameras. One went above the kitchen cabinets nestled between a cactus plant and a large ceramic chicken. The second he mounted in the living room on the same wall as the tv. It would capture the doors to the bedroom and shared bathroom as well as the couch where there was sure to be some level of daliancy.

The last he set on the balcony to capture the entire length. He would know when Jesse wandered out to smoke or look at the city and make his moves accordingly.

Soon Hanzo had them connected to his laptop and he settled in to watch the feeds for a moment. He just needed one in Jesse’s room and then he would have the entire apartment under surveillance.

After double checking the locks on the bathroom and main door to his room, he finally allowed himself to rest. Prepared for the nightmares, he buried himself under the blankets with a knife under the pillow.

No demons haunted his sleep and he dreamed of nothing but rivers under the summer sun.

For the first time he could remember, Hanzo woke to the smell of something delicious. It tickled his nose and hooked into his nostrils to lift him out of sleep and into a slumped seated position.

He could not remember the last time he had eaten bacon. Or had someone that would cook for him. It usually fell to him to provide for his clients and Genji when they were both present. He considered the closed door to the rest of the apartment.

Would Jesse make enough for him or was this a reminder of who held the power. Hanzo chewed his lip to try to quiet the growl of his stomach before reaching for his laptop. He logged in to the hidden portal and pulled up the kitchen feed.

Something cold and hard inside him cracked just a little.

 

-

 

Jesse hummed to himself as he cooked as if trying to banish the heavy winged moths that clung to his brain. It had been a late night but his internal clock was set to rise early as always. He had done his best to fight it but thoughts kept him from falling back asleep.

The type of thoughts that came with early mornings and suddenly tight boxers. He normally slept naked but with a guest in his home, it had seemed safer to put on something. The sleep pants hanging low on his hips hid the remains of his early morning fantasies.

A drop of grease popped and sizzled against his bare arm. He jerked back from the pan of bacon with a grimace and was quick to shake the sensation off. He should have put on a real shirt instead of just a tank top.

It was one of his favorites though. A simple black tank top with a coyote howling at the moon and “State Champs” that he had bought when he first started teaching at the university.

Flipping a pancake into the air and catching it back in the skillet with one hand, Jesse ran the other through his wild hair. It was longer than he usually kept it and with bedhead, it was crazier still.

He needed to get it cut and a trim for his beard. He needed to look like a professional and business man. _Wish i was back home, digging in the dirt._ He sighed as he glanced out the window at the sparkling city laid out below him.

 _You miss the adrenaline_ , his treacherous brain supplied as he cracked four eggs into a bowl, a splash of milk and began whisking. _You miss the chase._

 _The chase almost got me killed._ Jesse shot back at the sullen part of his brain that wouldn’t accept that he was just a antiques dealer and professor now. A normal, safe profession that paid far better than running across half a dozen countries and risking life and limb for a find.

Jesse reminded himself that danger was not sexy and rugged and sleeping in a room a few dozen feet from him. He had resisited temptation last night and it had served him well. He thought at least.

Haku’s surprise had been a good hint that he’d made the right decision to not try to kiss him. Not that he was stupid enough to actually try it.

Jesse tried to focus on making breakfast and pushed down the part of him that ached. Piling two plates high with western style food as well some steamed rice and pan seared salmon. He debated removing both from the serving tray. It was presumptuous to assume Haku would enjoy a more traditional breakfast but also inconsiderate to not offer in light of Haku’s recent move to the states.

Jesse added a small kettle of hot water and a selection of loose teas to the tray before hefting it. It was heavy and his biceps jumped to attention. The tanktop might have been a calculated move after all as he made his way to Haku’s closed door.

He balanced the load of steaming food in one arm and knocked with his free hand. “Haku? I made breakfast and i thought i could bring it to you.”

“Come in.”

The call was slow and velvety and Jesse found the door was already unlocked. He stepped through with deliberate motions, letting his long legs do their work. Haku laid in bed, propped up on his elbows and hair wild around his face. The silken strands danced in the early morning sunlight and turned it to spun gold.

Fire sparked in his lower belly at the way Haku’s eyes fell from his face to trace the lines of his body. He slid his weight forward, hips canting invitingly and lowered the tray to the undisturbed covers at Haku’s side.

“Mornin’, Darlin’.”

“Good Morning, Mr McCree.”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Big Shoutout to Belqoak for the ko-fis towards this fic! And to Megan from Patreon for sponsoring this chapter!

Hanzo closed his eyes to savor the smooth, earthy flavor of the tea Jesse had brewed for him. It was a perfect compliment to the richness of bacon and eggs and pancakes drizzled in butter and syrup and the honey sweet way Jesse was looking at him.

He preened under the bit of pampering though his thoughts raced. Jesse might be attempting to lull him into complacency or think a little tenderness might change the nature of their relationship. He would play the thirst in Jesse’s eyes to his advantage to make his stay here as comfortable as possible until he made his decision.

“You are a good cook.”

“Are you surprised?” Jesse’s smile could compete with the sun for its brightness and warmth. Hanzo tired to tamp down the swell in his chest. “I can cook a lot more than just this american stuff. Always try to pick up a few new recipes in whatever country I end up roaming through.”

Hanzo raised a brow, curious enough that he forgot to guard his expression.

“I wasn’t always a simple antiquities dealer.” Jesse stole a piece of bacon from the tray and munched away. The grease left his lips shiny and plump. Biteable. Hanzo tried to focus on the words coming out of them instead. “Though I don’t got much in the way of Japanese. I tried with what I could find online--”

Hanzo didn’t take his eyes off Jesse’s as he reached out and brushed his thumb along his bottom lip. A bit of crispy bacon and grease came off and he brought it to his lips. He slipped his tongue out slowly, letting it contour to the shape of his lip and flick the salty crumb off his thumb tip.

“I am satisfied with the offering you have made.” Hanzo calmly turned his attention to the bowl of rice and steamed salmon. He was ravenous despite the lack of physical activity the day before. 

Jesse’s loud gulp made him smile. He hide it with a sizable bite. It would not do to show any weakness to the fool. He would keep his masquerade going.

“W-well,” Jesse’s voice only cracked a little. “Shucks, that might be the best compliment I ever got.”

“I doubt that,” hanzo chuckled around the word. He glanced at the clock and then back to Jesse. He needed to plant cameras in Jesse’s room still and make an attempt at his laptop’s security protocol. 

“Will you require assistance today?” He asked before sipping his tea.

Jesse seemed thankful for the change of topics. He shifted on the bed, bringing one leg up and tucking it under him. “I was hoping you might want to come with me? But I understand if you need t’get settled in still.”

“Where are you going?”

“I need to head into the museum for an hour or two but then I was thinking, I could take you shopping.”

“Shopping?” Hanzo tilted his head to the side and glanced around his well furnished room. 

“Yeah,” Jesse shifted a bit closer. His hand spread and tightened on the sheets unconsciously. “I was thinking, you might need some things and I got the cash for your first month but this would be my treat.”

Hanzo stared at the tray, fighting down a shiver of optimism.  _ Is it a trap? _ He had not expected to actually get the six thousand in cash on the second day. Was Jesse a fool or just willing to lose the amount casually.

Either way, Hanzo quickly rewrote his plans for the day. “I will go shopping. I will require a new wardrobe, if I am to accompany you in public.”

 

\-- 

 

Jesse waited outside the changing room, fiddling with the zipper on his jacket. It gave him something to focus on other than Hanzo’s bare feet under the door to the changing area. Other shoppers nodded to him or glared and he shuffled out of the way as much as he could with his burden of clothes.

Only five were allowed in the room at a time and Hanzo had picked up half the store in the hour they’d been at the mall already. Jesse sighed as he looked down at a shiny pair of leather pants draped over his arm. 

He knew this was a dangerous suggestion from the moment he made it. Worry wriggled through his brain as he waited for Hanzo to appear. The slap of a discarded shirt made him look up. Clothes littered the floor and Hanzo tapped one foot on the smooth tile. 

“Having any luck, Darlin’?” he called softly, not wanting to disturb the other men in the changing room. 

“I believe I have found a piece I favor.” Hanzo’s words curled like wisps of smoke, tantalizing with a smirk. 

Sparks danced along Jesse’s hip bones and slide into his groin as the door to Hanzo’s room slowly opened. “Damn…” His mouth was dry as his eyes slide down Hanzo’s body. He glowed in the harsh lights, shirtless and flexing shamelessly. Jesse ached to slide his tongue over each and every valley of the man’s abs and lick his way down the vee to find a real treasure.

“Do you like them?” Hanzo twisted to show off the low hanging pants back. There was a golden dragon splayed across the ass and down the legs and Jesse bit his lip to keep in a sound that would get them thrown out of the store.

He swallowed, feeling pinned to the spot as Hanzo teased. There was nothing to give away how he felt to be under Jesse’s gaze except for a haughty lift of his nose. “I think they’re somethin’ all right. You should get them.” He steadied himself, the gay flush on his face almost burning. “And a shirt, if you’re going to come t’work with me.”

Hanzo squinted at him and then laughed. “As you wish. The leather pants, please.”

Jesse handed over the pants and got a pair of still warm briefs in his hand. He stared, mouth parting at the flash of navy blue and gold. He hadn’t even seen Hanzo pick up any underwear and yet.

The door clicked closed before Jesse could gather himself and he guilty shoved the piece into his pocket. He tangled his fingers into the satin and rubbed the crotch back and forth between his thumb and index finger.

It was still warm.

Jesse gulped and shifted to hide the growing bulge in his slacks. He didn’t need to out himself to these strangers also waiting around the changing rooms.  _ Why not? _ He dropped his gaze to Hanzo’s feet behind the door as something heavy and damp settled over his spirit.

No on knew him here or who he was and what did it really matter?

_ He was soft in the club when he was dancing on you. Why would someone that looks like that be interested in you? _

He stepped away from the dressing room area to sit by the shoes. He hunched forward with his elbows propped on his knees and head down. The store felt too warm and he tugged at his collar as sweat beaded on his neck.

Was everyone looking at him? A big, hulking guy with scruff on his face daydreaming about getting his brains fucked out by a smaller, sleeker man with eyeliner that made his gaze hypnotic. 

It was ridiculous.

A warm hand fell on his shoulder and he jumped hard enough to rattle the mirror behind the bench. 

“Are you alright?”

Jesse looked up into Hanzo’s eyes, a hint of softness in their depths and had to quickly turn away to hide the shame on his face. He didn’t want to be seen like this and yet ached for something to hold onto. 

He shivered as a comforting weight settled next to him and leaned into his shoulder. He closed his eyes, a wave of desperation overcoming his anxiety. He let himself slowly melt towards Hanzo like a plant seeking the sun.

It was easy to pretend, just for a moment that this was his real life. Out shopping with his boyfriend and teasing each other about horrible fashion choices. Stealing kisses and holding hands as they went about everyday life. He would gladly sell his soul for just a taste of that fantasy.

In a way, he already had. He was paying Hanzo to be near him, even now. Hanzo would leave when the money dried up or when he grew tired of him. It was all a summer’s dream fated to end badly.

Jesse rested his head on Hanzo’s shoulder, eyes still closed.

“It is difficult for you.” Hanzo murmured.

Jesse half shrugged, not lifting his head.

“I understand…’ Hanzo trailed off and the noise of the mall filtered in around them. It was more bearable now and Jesse managed a deep breath. He waited for Hanzo to continue but nothing came.

“Sorry.” Jesse covered his eyes with a hand, shielding his face from the man’s judgement. If only he had met Hanzo years ago when he might have been able to actually attract him. Life in one spot had added to his waistline and worn his sharp edges down.

Hanzo was all angles, cut like diamond and just as dangerous to the softness around his heart. 

“You do not need to apologize.” Hanzo’s words were detached but a hand crept over Jesse’s in his lap. “I have made my selections. We can leave when you are ready.”

Jesse nodded in relief as he stared at the finely cut hand covering his own. Like a work of art over rough hewn clay and he ached for each plane and curve of his body to be mapped and lovingly caressed by such hands.

Eventually, the moment had to break when a shop assistant approached and they rose together. For a moment, Jesse tightened his fingers in Hanzo’s, pleading for a few more seconds of fake closeness.

Distance dragged out between them and then the connection broke as Hanzo went gather his clothes from the room. Jesse managed to calm his racing heart and school his expression into something more appropriate.

The assistants still looked at him funny. He pushed the anxiety back and went to pay. He handed over his card and went to stand a bit to the side. Hanzo’s pile of clothes was impressive and exhaustive. He really had gotten an entire wardrobe, even down to matching ties and socks. 

Jesse took the bags automatically and carried them out of the store with Hanzo at his side. 

“You do not need to carry my bags,” Hanzo’s voice curled with a smirk as they filtered into the flowing crowds.

“Just seems right.”

 

\--

 

“Hmm,” Hanzo hummed non committedly as he watched out of the corner of his eye. The pieces of Jesse were beginning to come into focus and he was not happy with what he saw. It was all too human. All too real.

Jesse might not be a monster after all.

It was a troubling notion that followed Hanzo as they made their rounds to pick up his favorite type of tea, a bag full of asian snacks he missed from home and just as they were about to leave, Jesse stopped him with a tentative hand on his coat sleeve.

“Yes?” He tilted his chin, falling into an automatic coldness that soon melted at the flustered blush on Jesse’s face.

“I was thinkin’-” the big man shuffled his feet and shoved his hands into his pockets. “Maybe, you’d like t’get some ice cream? From the shop?” he jerked his head towards the little storefront with bright candy red paint.

Hanzo looked at his newly purchased wrist watch and raised a brow. It was barely afternoon. “You must have a quite the sweet tooth.” He glanced over Jesse with a craving of another kind.

Jesse’s face shuttered quicks as one of his arrows but Hanzo was the one pierced. His mistake was instantly blaring in his face. “I did not mean--”

“It’s okay,” Jesse’s smile was too tight. “Let me know if you want to stop and get lunch. I can call a car if you’d rather head back to the house.”

“I…” Hanzo fell silent as he searched for what he actually wanted. Until this moment, he had actually been enjoying the day with Jesse. The simple teasing, flirting and even just sitting with him had been so warm. 

He turned away from Jesse, shoulder set in a tight line. He left the man staring at his ridiculous cowboy boots and marched straight up to the counter. “I would like two scoops of pistachio and two of rocky road, both in waffle cones.” He stated his order solemnly to the teenage worker who instantly dropped the pen in her hand.

She blushed and stammered as she typed in his order and took his money. He was soon carrying two massive cones, complete with an impulse addition of sprinkles as he stomped his way to Jesse.

“Eat this, fool.”

He shoved the cone at Jesse and stepped towards the exit with an enthusiastic lick of his own sweet. He wasn’t going to hurt this dumb teddy bear.

More than he had too.

It was all for the con. He assured himself of it as Jesse fell in step next to him with the cutest blush on his cheeks. His tongue lapped up the silky mound of ice cream and heat pooled in Hanzo’s belly. 

Jesse certainly knew how to use his mouth.

Hanzo tried to banish the thought with a snort and shake of his head but it lingered. How handsome Jesse would look on his knees. Or laying on his back so that Hanzo could kiss the soft pudge of his stomach and sink his teeth into his full chest with a knee between his legs grinding away on his prize. 

“How’d you know I’d like Rocky Road?” Jesse interrupted his fantasies as they entered the courtyard of the shopping center. Jesse leading them straight to the fountain in the middle.

“I saw some in your freezer.”

“Glad you’re making yourself at home.” 

Hanzo nearly froze, realizing how easily had had let slip information that Jesse did not need to know. The man surely didn’t know that Hanzo had already snooped through most of his apartment and made himself very much at home. Like a spider spinning webs to trap its prey with secrets best said to empty rooms.

“What can I say,” Hanzo sat next to Jesse on the edge of the fountain, “I have quite the sweet tooth and needed to satisfy myself last night.”

_ In more ways than one. _

The water played in the background as Jesse smiled at him and a little more of the wall crumbled around Hanzo’s feet. His eyes danced and twinkled in the sun and his smile flashed bright half hidden by his ice cream cone. His long tongue was quick to flick out an deftly scoop up an almond chunk from the chocolately sweet and into his mouth.

Hanzo rolled his eyes but a laugh broke free before he could stop it. “You are far too proud of your skills.” He took a bite of his ice cream to prove his point. “You would be the man at all the parties trying to tie cherry stems in his mouth.”

“Shucks,” Jesse didn’t seem cowed at all. He nudged into Hanzo and the assassin begrudgingly let him. “I bet you did some dumb stuff back in the day tryin’ to impress some pretty girl.”

Hanzo narred his eyes at the man, fully aware of the question’s implications and the small hopefully tilt of Jesse’s head. He sighed dramatically, using the motion to disguise a quick scan of the courtyard. It was mostly empty on this side of the fountain and most of the noise came from the tables behind shady trees. He raised his ice cream cone and licked long and deep into the hollow to chase a bit of pistachio. 

At the same time he placed his hand firmly on Jesse’s mid thigh and leaned his weight on it casually. As if only to support his slouching posture as he licked away. Jesse was frozen beside him, every muscle tensed and rock hard beneath his hand. 

“I have never tried to impress a girl with what my tongue can do.” He slide his hand higher, savoring the sharp intake of breath. He worked small circles into Jesse’s thigh with his pinkie, letting it wander higher with every pass till he brushed along the suddenly taught fabric. Jesse whimpered, a needy, aching little sound that shot straight to his cock.

He could feel Jesse’s eyes on his mouth, on his hand, unable to decide where to look as Hanzo teased just out of reach. Jesse’s cone was forgotten, dripping ice cream down his fingers and threatening to fall to the mosaic of the fountain edge.

“You are going to make a mess.” Hanzo smirked as he leaned in, eyes burning with a cruel heat and licked the sticky sweet trail off Jesse’s fingers.

Jesse’s cone shattered with a wet crunch.

Hanzo could only laugh.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thanks Megan for sponsoring this chapter <3

Jesse spluttered as melted ice cream ran down his fingers and splattered on his jeans and the fountain’s base. Hanzo’s devilish smirk was burning him up and he couldn’t tear himself away. Not when pleasure sparked up and down his spine from the hand casually resting just shy of his half hard dick.

“Now that’s, not…” He gulped for air and managed to get the dripping remains of his cone off his pants. “Shit…”

“It seems you need a new outfit, Mr McCree.” Hanzo reached over slowly, as if he knew how Jesse’s heart strained, “As your assistant, I should help you pick one out.”

Jesse knew it was a bad decision; Hanzo had a way of just making him lose all his willpower. So when he ended up in the changing room of the fanciest place in the shopping center, he wasn’t entirely surprised.

Hanzo being in the room with him was.

“You can’t be in here?” Jesse protested, overwhelmed by the stack of clothes Hanzo had deposited in his arms. “Someone will notice you. We’ll get kicked out.”

Hanzo waved his hand at the idea and perched on the padded bench in the changing room. It was more private than the previous stores. The door went from floor to over their heads and there was plenty of room to move for two.

The mirrors cast Jesse’s form in a multitude of angles and Hanzo smirked behind him. “Who could see? As long as we are quiet, there will be no trouble.” 

“I…” Jesse swallowed the knot in his throat. He couldn’t find a good reason to kick Hanzo out, even if his hands were shaking slightly as he reached for his belt. He fumbled, not able to look away from Hanzo. He was in every reflection, weight rested on his hands as he leaned back. One leg casually crossed, he loosened his blue tie.

Jesse worked the buckle slowly, focusing on controlling the nerves in his cybernetic arm. His fingers twitched and jerked like it was his first day in physical therapy again. “Which pants should i… should i try on?” He tried to distract himself from the simmering gaze slowly raking over every inch of him.

He tried to stand straighter and push out his chest. The spot from the ice cream was cold and sticky against his thigh and he thanked the heaven’s his dick was at least down the other leg. He didn’t need to add to it.

“These.” Hanzo selected a pair of black slacks with a delicate pinstriping. 

“We’ll almost be matching,” Jesse’s voice sounded forced, even in his own ears. “Just… gotta get these off first.”

“It would help. Though you seem to be struggling.” Hanzo tilted his head up slightly, something almost cruel in his beautiful eyes. They fell to Jesse’s crotch and left a trail of fire in their wake.

He was hard, straining the zipper of his jeans even if he could have gotten the belt buckle open. “Hand is messing up.”

“Your hand?” Hanzo leaned forward, a predatory smile pushing up his cheeks.

“Yeah, it’s a prostheses…” Jesse trailed off in a breathy gust as Hanzo rose fluidly to his feet.

There wasn’t any air in the small room. Or space and his back hit the cool surface of the mirror. Desperation caught him and held him between fight and flight and surrender. His head fell to the side as Hanzo leaned in close.

Hot breaths gusted over his throat and lips ghosted up to his ear. “If your hands are unable to complete the task, perhaps I should assist you.”

“N-Nah.” Stars bloomed behind Jesse’s eyes as he squeezed them shut. Screwing up his self control, he held onto the tatters at the heat radiating from Hanzo. So close it would only take the smallest shift and they would merge together.

Jesse’s knees weakened as a hand rose to his hair. He leaned in to the soft touch, burying his face in the soft cup of Hanzo’s palm. He couldn’t bare to look at the man as he spoke. HIs lips brushed against Hanzo’s warm skin with each word.

“I know you’re playing me, darlin’.” He drew a slow breath and held it for a heart beat. “But I can’t seem to care right now.”

 

-

 

Hanzo smirked against the man’s warm neck. He dragged his nosetip along the strong tendons up to right under his jaw. Heat pooled in his belly and curled deliciously around his groin. He had Jesse twisted around his finger so tightly he could make the man snap at any second.

“Playing? I do not know what you could mean.” Hanzo purred the words right into his ear, soaking up the breathy shudder that racked through him. “I am your assistant. Should I earn my pay?”

Jesse’s face scrunched tight, teeth clenched around a helpless sound and Hanzo watched each tiny twitch and shift as he trailed a finger over Jesse’s collarbone. Sparks burst in his chest when Jesse’s heavy hands settled on his hips and his thumbs pressed into his hipbones.

“Don’t… don’t think I paid for this.”

“You require new pants after getting these messy.” Hanzo tapped his fingers over the gentle swell of Jesse’s left pec. It was just a bit soft from good food and a natural thickness. “You cannot go to work looking like this.”

Jesse tensed under him, eyes closed and breathing fast. A tiny aborted thrust of his hips made Hanzo’s mouth dry and he pressed just a little closer. It was easy to push between Jesse’s legs and settle hsi thigh firmly against his bulge. 

He was big and hard and so hot it almost burned. “H-Haku, you dont… i can…”

“Shut. your. Mouth.” Hanzo growled each word into Jesse red ear and he dug two fingers into the hem of Jesse’s jeans. A moan set his blood to boiling and Jesse’s head tilted back. Sweat beaded on his forehead and trailed down his face.

Hanzo smirked and twisted his fingers to force under the Jesse’s boxers and into his thick body hair. “Now let’s get this belt off. You need to get changed.”

“Oh darlin’,” Jesse blew out the words as he went pliant.

Hanzo could do anything to him right now and if things had been different, he might have fallen to his knees and buried his face in the musky humid junction of his thighs. Instead he brushed his thumb along the heavy buckle’s edge. Just low enough that his blunt nail dug across Jesse’s Jeans.

The man’s hands tightened on his hips but didn’t move. The man was frozen in time as he burned. It kindled the brush in Hanzo’s own core and he savored the flush. How long had it been since he’d felt genuine attraction to anyone? 

Hanzo dragged his thigh up and down the seam of Jesse’s legs till he had Jesse rocking in time with it. “Good boy,” Hanzo pressed a long slow kiss to the side of his neck in praise. He let Jesse grind against him, chasing the pleasure, while he turned his attention to his buckle. It was tacky and beautiful and heavy in his hands. 

It was easy to get the clasp done and he sucked in a breath as the leather hissed. The belt sang through each loop and Jesse shuddered hard against his thigh. He hadn’t spoken yet and Hanzo reward him with a rough grind as he popped the button.

Heat rolled off Jesse as Hanzo dragged the zipper down agonizingly slow. Each tooth of the zipper seemed to sing as it released and Hanzo brushed his knuckles along the bulge. Jesse whimpered above him, chewing on his hand to keep from crying out.

Hanzo peeled back the sides of his fly and tugged them low enough to dig under his balls. Drool flooded his mouth at the sight of the sweet fat sac wrapped in red cotton. HIs cock pushed forward into the space and Hanzo licked his lips.

He pulled back reluctantly and looked up at Jesse. His pupils were blown wide and hair mussed from dragging his hands through it. Russet blush stained his cheeks and down his neck and a needy, desperate look burned in his eyes.

Hanzo smirked and licked his lips before stepping away. Cold air rushed in where Jesse’s thighs had held him and for a moment, Jesse’s hand on his hips tightened. “Haku…”

Hanzo tisked at him and stepped out of reach to leave Jesse panting and wanting with pre making a wet spot on his tacky underwear.

 

-

 

  
Jesse struggled to catch his breath, heaving like a bull without a matador to charge at. Sweat trickled down his neck and he had stared down at the obscene tent of his boxer briefs. Ache throbbed from deep in his belly and hips and he nearly sobbed at being left so suddenly. He hadn’t been this hard in so long, if ever and he shuddered at the way Haku was still looking at him.

“You’re a mean man,” Jesse groaned as he ran both hands through his hair. He was sure he could come if he tried to handle himself back into his pants and not even feel shame when Haku had made him so flustered.

“I do not know what you could mean.” Haku laughed as he lounged back on the padded bench. The fresh pants were draped over his knee, along with a pair of dress socks. “I suggest you try these on like a good boy.”

Jesse opened his mouth to grumble about the term but the way his dick twitched made it pointless. He swallowed the dryness in his mouth and reached out to get his pants. HIs fingertips trailed along the hard muscle, daring to take a few seconds for himself. Hanzo didn’t blink, dark eyes half lidded and a smirk curled in the corner of his mouth.

Jesse shimmied out of his ice cream stained pants, not sure how to be as sexy as he wanted. His dick bobbed against the fabric as he kicked them off and stooped to start pulling the new pair on. He glanced up in time to see Hanzo’s eyes on the mirror behind Jesse and he twisted to look.

The floor to ceiling mirror’s showed off his thick ass and thighs and Jesse’s heart began to sink. Changing room mirrors had never been kind to him and he shied away from the sight of his fat ass and the stretchmarks on his thighs under the brown of his skin. He hadn’t shaved or trimmed in weeks and the dark hair littered his legs and his face burned with shame to think of the mess his crotch was. He was big and hairy and fat and Haku wouldn’t give him the time of day without the monetary incentive.

He didn’t have any trouble pulling his pants up and zipping up. His erection had disappeared along with his confidence. He didn’t look in the mirror to see how the fit was and kept his eyes down as he pulled on his socks and shoes.

“This is good enough for now. I need to get to work.” Jesse couldn't look Haku in the eye as he gathered his old jeans and wallet and slipped out of the dressing room. He needed to get his head back in the game. He had more things to do than flirt and let his heart want things that he couldn’t have.

Haku followed quietly and they soon checked out and were headed towards the car. The sun was high and bright and it helped his mood improve a little. It wasn’t as healing as being out in the country but he was smiling a little as he helped load all of Haku’s bags into the trunk.

“If you need more, I can bring you back another time. Or you can use the car when i’m at work.” Jesse slung his arm over the back of Haku’s seat as he backed out of the space and he missed the hungry look the man gave his chest under the tight button down. “If you decide t’stay, could look into leasing a car for you. If you don’t want to ride your bike when picking up groceries and things.”

“That would be agreeable.” Haku chuckled softly, the sound warm over the acoustic guitar coming through the radio. “What errands and duties will fall to me at your work?”

Jesse sighed in relief to have the conversation go in a safer direction. “I make a lot of trips with documents back and forth between my office and our notary and the museum’s storehouse so I would appreciate the extra set of hands. I always worry i’m gonna trip and drop the stack of boxes or worse. You got an eye for detail and i’m hoping you can help spot shady dealers. I have my ways of investigating and authenticating but sometimes you need extra eyes.”

“Do you dabble in illegal art trade, McCree?” Hanzo’s voice betrayed his interest and amusement, dropping low with a little pur at the end.

“Not illegal exactly. Most of the art I procure for the museum is through art houses and auctions but the other bidders can be--” Jesse searched for the right word. “--cutthroat. Sellers too don’t always hold themselves to the highest standard.”

“Why do you assume I would be helpful to you in these ways? I am just a stripper.”

Jesse’s eyes flicked to him for a moment before returning to the highway. “Now, don’t take offense, but I ain’t as dumb as a i look and I know a thing or two about Japanese tattoos. Especially authentic tattoos that end just before a sleeve would. I figure you might know a thing or two about spotting a bad guy in a crowd.”

“I did not agree to be your bodyguard.”

“Nothing like that,” Jesse was quick to respond. “I know you could kick my ass six ways t’sunday and i’d thank you for it but I ain’t needing any muscle. Just someone to watch my back and…” he swallowed the lump in his throat as he took an exit ramp. “Let me hold them.”

“I find these terms acceptable.” Haku leaned back in his chair, a sly look peeking out behind the mask of indifference.

Jesse wished he could get inside Haku’s head. The desire only continued as they sorted through boxes full of pottery of all kinds jumbled together. The office was big but his desk was covered in papers and too many empty coffee mugs so they had opted to sit on the floor with the boxes between them.

“What are we looking for again?” Hanzo murmured, turning a long, thin vase over in his hands.

“I bought these from an estate sale last month. They are mostly fakes and replicas but I suspect a few are originals.” Jesse set a water jug down, suspecting it was a fake as well. “I want to add them to the French Renaissance exhibit to show the more authentic lifestyle. So look for pieces that are signed or stamped on the bottom and have a proper weight to them.”

“I see.” Haku went back to sorting through the box between his outstretched legs. He put some to the side but most went into a basket marked “donate’ and Jesse was happy just to work with someone near him.

It got lonely working here by himself for hours on end even if they didn’t talk much. The work gave him something for his hands to do and he was surprised at how accurate Hanzo was in finding the few originals.

He packed the back into a single box and stuffed the paper back around them. “I’ll take these to the authentication board on Monday just to double check but I think few found a few treasures. You ready to head into the back room?”

Jesse hefted the box of valuable pottery under one arm and climbed to his feet. He tried not to look down at Haku and how his face was right at the level of his groin. Heat bubbled up to his cheeks and he headed for the door before he could make a bigger fool of himself.

Haku followed closely and Jesse jumped to feel hands ghosting over his hips. A hefty squeeze made him shudder, love handles firmly cupped in strong hands. “Haku?” he murmured, tongue thick and heavy in his mouth. Haku gave them another squeeze, rolling over the bit of fat with his thumbs.

“Your shirt had come untucked at the sides.” Haku gave nothing away on his face but Jesse suddenly found the box taken from under his arm. “I am your assistant. I shall carry this.”

“Sure thing, darlin’,” Jesse was proud his voice almost normal.

Haku laughed and his gait shifted slightly.

It showed off the heavy muscles in his legs and ass quite nicely.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thanks Megan for sponsoring this chapter! <3

Jesse sighed and rolled over to his other side. The bed was too big. The mattress was too soft and the shadows were watching him. He needed to see a sleep therapist again. Or maybe try a smaller bed. Or get a cat.

He just needed something warm and happy to cuddle up with him. It was hard to sleep alone. Even years after the incident, he woke in a cold sweat when he did manage to drift off. Nightmares lurked behind his eyes and he choked on the anxiety filling his throat. 

He kicked the blankets off his feet to cool down but something pricked in the back of his mind. He had to pull his feet away from the edge of the bed, as if the monsters in his head were under his bed.

With a groan, Jesse turned on the tv at the foot of his bed. There was nothing on of course and he ended up wasting half an hour browsing netflix before settling on a show he’d watched a dozen times.

It was comforting to hear the same voices and the same story again and again. He ignored the cruel part of himself pointing out it was the same comfort a child took from a favorite bedtime story.

He let his brain shut off, just watching without processing much. He hoped it wasn’t too loud. 

_ Hanzo…  _

Heat rushed down his spine and settled in his groin. The memory of Hanzo pressing him into the mirror was fresh in his mind. How hot his hands had been against his scalp and the glorious friction. Hanzo had invited him to grind on his muscled thigh, slowly undulating and driving him to madness.

Jesse rolled himself on to his back, staring up at the ceiling fan. The image of Hanzo half kneeling to undo his fly was burned into the back of his eyelids. “Good Boy.” Jesse whispered the words to himself and shivered.

Hanzo’s voice was curled inside him, stroking him with those whispered encouragements. Jesse slide his hand down his middle. The cotton tshirt was cool under his palm and he ignored the slight pudge of his stomach. 

“Jesus.” Jesse moaned as he palmed himself. He was so hard it hurt. He whined and twisted to bury his face into his bicep.  _ Hanzo over top of him, big hands squeezing Jesse’s thighs and bending him in half. _ Jesse squeezed his fat cock.  _ On his hands and knees with his face buried in the pillow as Hanzo’s tongue plunged into him. His beard would scratch and burn on the tender skin and a finger slowly nudging in beside the tongue to make him moan.  _

Reality slapped Jesse in the face when he caught a flash of his reflection in the massive tv screen. Sprawled out on the bed, sweaty and flushed with his cock standing up and dark shadows of body hair clustered around his groin and up the curve of his stomach, he cursed the trap he’d laid for himself.

Hanzo was only playing him. Only working his weak points for a paycheck and would leave as soon as Jesse ran out of money. It sobered him and he curled into himself to stare at the darkness. 

_ But the way he looked at me... _ Jesse squeezed his eyes closed. He was foolish but he wanted to believe that Hanzo had meant it. He let himself dream of a life he was afraid to admit to wanting. Just little snippets to ease away the sadness filtered through his self doubt. He dreamed of coming home to a smiling boyfriend, sharing stories of their days and kissing sweetly on the couch.

Traveling to far away lands in search of treasures and cheating death would be a wonderful reality. He was older now, not as daring and not as reckless, but he itched to be back in the field. At least from the comfort of his bed, he ached for closeness and adventure and someone to share his life with.

Someone big and beefy with a sharp wit that would be a true partner in all things.

_ He agreed to let me hold him. _ Jesse dragged a hand over his face. He didn’t have to be alone. At least not right now. And hanzo had strong enough arms to hold him safe and sound. Jesse pushed himself up to a seated position. He could ask, not demand, if Hanzo was willing to hold him. Or at least stay up with him for a while until he wasn’t afraid to go to sleep anymore. 

Jesse swallowed the lump in his throat.

Maybe Hanzo was still awake.

It didn’t hurt to ask.

  
  


-

 

Hanzo looked up at a soft knock at his bedroom door. A quick glance to the clock confirmed it was just after midnight. Flicking to the surveillance camera feed on his tablet, he frowned to see Jesse standing in front of his door.

His broad shoulders were slumped and his hair was wild. There was sweat clinging to his t-shirt despite the chill of the ac in the room. Hanzo considered the man at his door, weighing the options, calculating the risk, but before he could decide, Jesse turned away. 

Hanzo almost got up to stop him. 

Something stopped him like a leaden weight on his feet. It was foolish, to give away more of his time.  _ More of myself. _ He swallowed and looked away from the screen for a moment. He could not risk becoming more involved and yet, the compulsion to join Jesse on the couch was strong. 

He could have the big, hairy, squeezable man in his arms or in his lap. Jesse had responded so beautiful to his teasing in the dressing room and Hanzo wanted to see it again. He watched Jesse put his head in his hands, shoulder hunched and he knew this was his opportunity.

He set the laptop down after making sure the cameras were trained on the couch and recording. Vanity made him stop and brush out the kinks in his hair and tuck it back before heading into the living room.

The sound of the tv obscured his footsteps and he lurked for a moment, just observing. The light was harsh on Jesse’s face, highlighting the cut of his nose and the boldness of his square jaw. There were no tears on his cheeks but his eyes were hollow, staring into nothing.

Hanzo softened, the tension melting from his shoulders and he moved slowly. “Jesse?” He called low and smooth, like he was speaking to a frightened animal. The man still flinched, eyes going huge before the tension broke with a weak laugh.

“Hope I didn’t wake you up.” Jesse dragged a hand down his face before scratching at his beard. 

“I was having trouble sleeping.” Hanzo made his way to the kitchen. He fetched a carton of ice cream and two spoons before wandering to the couch. He slumped into the seat next to Jesse and offered him a spoon. The cushions dipped and he ended up pressed against his side. “Sugar will help.”

“Only if you’re the one givin’ it.” Jesse rumbled as he grabbed the utensil. He froze the next second. “Sorry, I didn’t mean it like that. Just force of--”

Hanzo pressed a finger to his lips, silencing the gush of anxiety. “Quiet. It is late.” Hanzo lifted his arm and slung it over Jesse’s shoulders. It took a little adjustment but he got the taller man tucked neatly against his side.

He settled the ice cream tub in Jesse’s lap and took a scoop for himself. “Just watch Gordon Ramsay yell at idiots in peace.”

They watched for a few minutes in blessed silence, eating rocky road and occasionally fighting over a choice bit. He would not be denied his marshmallow fluff. A battle of spoons lasted just long enough for Jesse’s hand to bump the inside of the carton and come away sticky.

Jesse raised it to his mouth and Hanzo shivered as Jesse’s long tongue lulled out to lick it up. Saliva shone in the light of the screen and the man’s lips were bright and wet and begging to be kissed. 

A shouting match on screen distracted him and they both laughed. It was ridiculous to deny that the food was hideous and the crocodile decor was tacky even for florida. “Who can’t cook a steak? It isn’t that hard. I could do better on the little charcoal grill on the balcony.”

“You will have to back those claims up.” Hanzo reached up to trail his fingers through Jesse’s hair. It was messy and tangled and he continued to absently comb through it. Jesse sighed, a heavy breath of relief.

“You keep playing with my hair, I’ll do whatever you want.”

Hanzo snorted and curled his fingers into his hair. He tugged against the roots at the base of his skull with a sly smile. Jesse’s eyes rolled up and his mouth parted with a silent ‘oh’. Desire flashed hot and needy in his groin and he subtly repeated the action as Kitchen Nightmares continued to play.

A subtle shift of Jesse’s hips betrayed his increasing interest and the sweat pants tented higher. Hanzo pretended not to notice what he was doing. His eyes were on the screen while his fingers tormented the man and eased him gentle closer.

Shifting to rest his left side against the arm of the couch, Hanzo lead Jesse into the dip. The big man’s legs opened slightly, inviting Hanzo to look at the fat treasure hidden away but he had other plans for the moment.

Leaning heavily on the arm, he settled Jesse along his side under his arm till he was half underneath him. It made it easier to slide his hand from Jesse’s hair to his neck. He squeezed gently at the rock hard muscles and Jesse moaned.

“Darlin’, you really gonna make melt.”

“That is my intention.” Hanzo continued his gentle assault on the knots in Jesse’s trap muscles. He kept his palms firmly against his beautiful skin to let the heat seep in. He drew small circles against the base of Jesse’s skull with his thumb between squeezes. Contentment welled up and settled in his chest as they rested together like they had been made to fit.

Hanzo noticed Jesse’s subtle shift a few minutes later and he peeled some of his attention away from the show to focus back on Jesse. He was holding himself just a little away.

Hanzo pulled him tighter with a hum. He was greedy. He admitted it easily to himself and he wanted the contact. If it appeased and lulled Jesse into a false sense of safety, so be it. The man’s wealth was still the main target. The ultimate goal was to make it out rich and with blackmail to keep Jesse from going to the police to report it.

“I’m not hurtin’ ya, am i?” Jesse’s voice was surprisingly small, uncertain and Hanzo looked at him with an eyebrow raised. “Not… squashing you?”

Jesse’s eyes were downcast and red darkened his cheeks, even in the uncertain light of the tv. From his position, Hanzo looked down Jesse’s top to the plush chest that begged to be kissed and licked and nibbled on and to the rest of the man’s thick physique. 

Hanzo swallowed a sudden dryness in his throat. Instead of speaking, he slid his hand down Jesse’s back and fisted in his shirt. “You are not hurting me.” Hanzo tugged him closer. Chest to chest, Hanzo trapped the man against him with an iron arm across his hips. “Now settle down so we can watch Chef in peace.”

“Yessir,” Jesse whispered, sounding quiet in a much different way.

“Good boy,” Hanzo stroked Jesse’s back reassuringly, not missing how the man shivered at his words.

They stayed like that for one episode and then another until Jesse fell asleep against him. A strange sense of pride rose in him to have soothed Jesse and gotten him to rest. He decided not to think too closely on it as he got to his feet. Jesse didn’t stir when Hanzo lifted him into his arms. He was heavy but not a burden and Hanzo carried him to his bed with a half smile on his face.

He laid Jesse down and covered him with his blanket. He imagined that the line between the man’s eyebrows had relaxed. “Fool.” Hanzo sighed as he stroked his fingers through Jesse’s beard before quietly leaving.

He even forgot to plant a camera while he had the chance.

While Jesse had found sleep, Hanzo did not. He tossed and turned on the mattress. In the end, he turned to his sake gourd and drowned himself in the liquor. 

 

\--

 

“You don’t have t’cook,” Jesse protested, watching Hanzo put on his apron. He really hadn’t meant to make his assistant prepare dinner with his casual rumbling about hunger. “I can order something for us.”

“I am your assistant. You are hungry. I will cook you something so you can continue working.” Hanzo brandished a spatula at him threateningly and Jesse’s heart gave a little flutter. “You will forget to take care of yourself otherwise.”

It was true. Jesse had a terrible habit of forgetting to eat or shower when he was in the middle of researching or an acquisition. He decided to let Hanzo take care of him a little and returned to his laptop.

He lost track of time as he waded through a mass of emails about a newly found collection of thirteenth century italian paintings which he suspected were stolen. It did put him in contact with the ‘discoverer’ and he was in the middle of arranging a meet up when Hanzo appeared in front of him.

Glancing up, he flushed to see the apron strained tight across his chest and sweat clinging to his neck from the heat of the stove. It was Hanzo’s smile that caused his brain to stutter out mid sentence. 

“You need a break.”

“I just gotta finish this up real quick.” Jesse lifted his laptop a little. “Trying t’set up a meetin’.”

Hanzo quirked an eyebrow and leaned over to look. It made his bangs fall from behind his ear and Jesse shivered at the smell of cedar and woodsmoke. Jesse swallowed back the urge to reach out and touch it.

“Hmm, very well.” Hanzo stood up and walked away leaving Jesse wanting.

He shot off a quick request to talk later and nearly dropped his laptop in his hurry to follow. “Sorry, that was rude o’me.” Jesse hustled to the neatly set table. A heavenly rich smell wafted up to him and his mouth started watering. A large, shallow bowl sat in front of both seats filled with beautiful pale noodles, leafy greens, shallots and a carefully sliced and fanned out egg.

“Ramen?” jesse rubbed his hands together eagerly. “I ain’t had authentic ramen in years.”

“It is a family recipe.” Hanzo rewarded him with a smile. “Have you spent much time in Japan?”

Jesse poured the steaming broth over the noodles with care. Aromatics hit his nose in a harmony of scents. Closing his eyes, he savored the preview of what was to come. 

“Was in Japan for a while, studyin’ under a expert. Learned all I could about the history in the short time I was there. I would love t’go back sometime.”

Hanzo hummed but didn’t answer as he poured his own broth. They began to eat quietly and Jesse savored each bite. It was just as good as he remembered fresh from Tokyo, maybe better in fact.

“I didn’t figure you one t’cook.” Jesse carefully gathered a slice of the boiled egg in his chopsticks. “But this is amazin’.”

“I have always looked after my little brother, including cooking.” Hanzo didn’t look up from his bowl. “He prefers to eat american food now though. Embracing the culture.”

“Don’t get my wrong--” Jesse slurped the end of a noodle into his mouth. “I’m all for a classic hamburger or grilled steak but when you got someone who can make you food like this? It’s a waste t’not use it.”

Hanzo chuckled. “I will cook for you as long as you are happy to eat it.”

“I ain’t gonna turn down your cookin’ any time soon, Darlin’.” Jesse raised a bit of pork in a mock salute. It made Hanzo frowned sharply and he quickly popped the bit into his mouth. “Sorry.”

“Horrible manners.”

Jesse shrugged and reached into Hanzo’s bowl to steal a piece of his meat instead. He smirked as he chewed, daring Hanzo to do something about it. It fell away into a flushed sputter when the man simply raised another bit of meat to Jesse’s lips instead.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> thanks megan for sponsoring this chapter! <<3
> 
> Jesse doesn't know that Haku is Hanzo but i might mistype so please forgive

Hanzo offered the bite of food with a smirk. If Jesse was going to praise his food and yet struggle with consuming it properly, it was up to him to assist. “Open your mouth like a good boy,” Hanzo purred, holding Jesse’s gaze without blinking.

The flush of red across his face made Haku smile. “Do not make me ask twice or I might not cook for you again.”

Jesse’s mouth popped open even as he looked away, red to his ear tips.

“That’s a good boy.” hanzo delicately invaded Jesse’s mouth to place the morsel of stewed beef on the man’s tongue. Every little twitch and squirm sent a shiver down Hanzo’s spine as Jesse closed his lips around the chopsticks to take the food.

“How is it?” Hanzo relentlessly picked up a bit of egg and raised it to his lips.

“G-Good. Really good. You don’t- you don’t gotta feed me though.” Jesse wouldn’t look him in the eyes, twisting the napkin in his lap between his fingers.

“Nonsense.” Hanzo reached across the small table and took Jesse’s jaw in his hand. A shuddering breath encouraged him to keep going as he raised the chopsticks. “You will eat or do I have to come over there and make you?”

 

*****

 

“N-no sir,” Jesse stammered and leaned forward to close his mouth around Haku’s chopsticks. Trying his best to ignore the liquid gold pooling in his groin at the threat. He very much wanted Haku to make him do anything he wanted. Anything to keep him looking at him like that. “It’s… it’s so good Haku. Thank you for cookin’ for me and everythin’.”

Haku nodded his approval. “Here, you must try the broth.” He scooted his chair halfway around the table to raise a spoonful of the flavorful broth. “Be careful. It is still very hot.”

“Your’s is gonna get cold though, iffa you’re only feedin’ me.” Jesse protested, nervous energy twisting tighter in his stomach. This couldn’t be happening. It was like the dressing room all over again and his cock was not obeying his please to calm down. He couldn’t be seeing things right, not with Haku so close and looking at him as if he was on the menu.

Sweat stuck to Haku’s skin, shimmering at his neck in open invitation to be kisses away. The thin shirt hugged his every muscle and the luxuriously sprawling tattoo just begged for him to stare at his pec. It was hefty and thick and would fill his hand up so perfectly.

“Perhaps you should repeat the gesture. Then we will both be fed.”

Jesse jumped and gutily yanked his gaze away from Haku’s chest. He’d barely realized there was a noodle offered to him until Haku’s dark eyes flicked to it. He leaned forward quickly to take the end in his mouth. Pursing his lips and sucking it up little by little as he tried to get the noodle away from the chopsticks.

 

He made the mistake of looking up to find Haku’s eyes burning as he watched. The heat was high on his fine cheekbones and surely a man couldn’t fake a blush like that could he? But if he wasn’t faking.

 

The noodle slapped his chin when Haku released the pressure suddenly. Jesse jumped, snapping out of it as broth trickled down his beard and fell onto his chest. The henley was a size too small and even with all the buttons open, it strained more than he wanted to admit. Watching the single drop of broth run down the swell of his peck and into his chest hair was a horror he had never experienced quite as acutely.

Pain throbbed in his stomach as he clenched hard around the flush of shame. Just as hot as the lust that had been there only a second before but it made him cold somehow. Fingers shaking, he wiped away the shiny, slightly oily trail with his napkin. God what a fucking disaster he was. A perfect, pristine, gorgeous man was sitting next to him, feeding him food he had made by hand and he was slurping and spilling and making himself look like a proper pig.

He might as well have shoved his face in the bowl to slurp and shovel it in.

 

“My apologies, it seems I can’t control my chopsticks well enough to make it all the way to you.” Haku chuckled and the sound made Jesse hope that just maybe, Haku wasn’t entirely repulsed by him. “I will have to rectify the situation.”

 

Jesse starred, unable to blink as Haku rose to his feet and walked the two steps between them. “S-Sure, Sugar. Anything ya want.” He stumbled over himself, reflexively leaning back to look up at the solid wall of muscle.

 

“Good.” Haku stepped out of his side as he disappeared behind Jesse and tears pricked the back of his throat. He had fucked up so bad. He couldn’t even get a man he was paying to eat a full meal with him he was so disgusting. “I do hate to let a good seat go to waste.”

Jesse couldn’t lift his head, staring blankly at his bowl of steaming, delicious food. His stomach ached and soured.

 

Suddenly his chair was dragged back and he yelped. Grabbing at the table to stable himself as Haku twisted the armless chair a quarter turn. “W-what are you doing?” he managed to get out, looking up just in time to fall mute again.

 

Haku’s hand burned on his shoulder, leaving searing marks as it trailed across the muscle to settle on the back of his neck. “Open your legs.” Haku ordered, voice liquid smoke poured into his ear and his toes curled at the flash of fear and desire all mixed together in a storm.

He obeyed instantly, thighs going soft and lax as he opened his stance. He hadn’t even realized that he had been so tense with his knees crushed together. _Please don’t look down._ He prayed. The napkin in his lap was doing a valiant job of covering the throbbing erection that had come back to life like he was a teen again but there was no mistaking it.

 

Even with his stomach pushing past his belt a little, the size and girth stood out and he fought the urge to hunch in on himself to cover it. Haku couldn’t blame him for having one, not when he was twirling bits of his hair around his fingers and smiling down at him. He would have to be a saint to not be squirming in twisted pleasure at Haku’s orders.

 

“Lean back.” Haku’s demand was punctuated with a tug on his hair and Jesse couldn’t bite back a moan. He quickly complied, breathing too fast as he realized just what the man was thinking. “Good boy.”

 

Jesse could have cum just from Haku telling him too. He obeyed, leaning back and letting his ass slide across the cushioned seat a few inches. He had more than enough lap for a man like Haku to dominate. He bit his lip as Haku gracefully slid into his space. The hand in his hair left as Haku draped his arm around his shoulders and took up a seat on his thigh.

 

A whimper broke past his lips and he buried his face against Haku’s shoulder to keep from saying somethin’ a big man like him wasn’t supposed to say. But god, he could feel the bands of steel in Haku’s thighs and the tight, perky swell of his ass. How hard and deep Haku could fuck him if he wanted, probably twist him up all pretty and hold him up against a wall while he broke him down into a sobbing mess.

 

“Here, put your mouth to good use.”

 

Jesse went cross-eyed as Haku deftly held another noodle in front of his face. He leaned forward to meet it and as his lips parted, the chopsticks invaded. Silky smooth and wet, he shivered as he slurped the noodle obediently.

 

Haku was watching, he could feel the gaze as heavy as fingertips on his mouth. How he’d like to use it on the man instead of the food. He would have gotten on his knees for him in a second. Each bite was torture as Haku twisted and shimmied on his thigh to get another morsel. Each one brought that muscled ass closer to his cock and he fought to breath.

 

Eyes closed he bit down hard enough to hear his jaw pop, he barely kept in a moan as Haku settled his ass firmly against his cock. The table creaked as he held on, fighting to keep his hands from moving where they weren’t wanted.

 

“Hmm, this seat is a little lumpy.” Haku murmured a second before Jesse was crying out in pleasure.

 

Restraint broke as Haku ground that perfect hard ass along his cock and Jesse grabbed at his hips. Panting against the back of his neck, he dragged at the man to pull him back again as if he needed to encourage the movement.

 

“Fuck, f-fuck sweetheart,” Jesse whimpered, staring down Haku’s front as he undulated against him. The chopsticks were abandoned on the table, pretense forgotten. Haku swirled his hips and both his hands came back to dig into Jesse’s hair.

 

 

Jesse hid his face against Haku’s shoulder, struggling to breath through each sensual, slow roll of his hips. Throbbing hard, he dug his fingers into the curve of Hanzo’s hips and guiding him back tight at the end of each torturous grind. Precum bubbled up and slide across his fat cockhead.

 

He could feel it sticking to his underwear and smearing against his heated skin. “Haku, f-fuck, you ain’t gotta do this.” The words rasped from his dry throat and he hated himself for saying them. He couldn’t stop himself, he couldn’t push Haku away as much as he tried.

 

“I am doing nothing that I do not want to do.” It was unfair for the man to remain so composed and calm when he was grinding his ass along Jesse’s cock and thighs like the stripper he was.

 

It was unfair, so incredibly unfair.

 

Jesse groaned, breathless and shaking as he lifted his hips just enough to grind himself up the sweet cleft of the man’s ass through his sweats. Sliding his fingers along the sharp cut of his hipbones, he felt the little hitch in Haku’s breathing. Just a approval and he squeezed the man’s thick, muscled thighs and brought his thumbs to tease along his hip creases.

 

**********

 

Hanzo rocked his ass over Jesse’s lap and savored the heat of the muscle and meat. The man’s hands on his thighs only encouraging him to keep going and there was no soft cock to insult him like their first meeting. This time, Jesse was shaking and whimpering at the simple lap dance.

 

Adorable.

 

Hanzo could have pushed him over the edge easily. It would only take a few tugs on the man’s hair and a nice figure eight swirl of his hips to get the big man to cum against his ass. It would be a big, messy load from pent up arousing and the endless teasing Hanzo had tortured him with over the last few weeks.

 

Right as the fingers tensed on his hips, thumbs shaking as they pressed in to touch the top of his bulge, Hanzo slide off his hips to stand.

 

“I should put dinner away before it goes bad. You had an meeting to schedule, didn’t you?” He chuckled without turning around.

 

“Please…”

 

Hanzo jumped as Jesse’s hands stroked along his hips and fingertips stole beneath the edge of his shirt. Breathes, hot and wet, panted against the small of his back and the weight of Jesse’s forehead came to rest on in the dip.

 

Hanzo shivered, head tipping back as desire rolled through him. Even the tightness of his sweats was too much stimulation and he shifted restlessly. He wanted Jesse but Jesse did not want him, not really. Jesse would see him writhing beneath him on his cock and Hanzo was not willing to give that away for free.

 

The promise of stolen fortunes was not enough and he shook his head. “Jesse, what kind of assistant would I be if I let your work go unfinished?” He plucked the man’s hands from his hips but didn’t let them go just yet.

 

“R-right. Right. Yeah,” Jesse’ voice ghosted along the sliver of skin between his shirt and waistband. A gusting breath sent a flush through his veins and though he did not want Jesse to dip lower, he wanted to chase that sad, lonesome sigh away.

 

Hanzo slowly turned, resting his ass on the edge of the table instead. Jesse wouldn’t look up from his hands, dangling between his legs and a fat bulge still straining his jeans.

 

“Though, perhaps you need proper motivation.” Hanzo licked his lips, staring at the plush pecs that were only accentuated from Jesse’s posture and Hanzo’s angle. He reached out, hooking a single finger into the opening of his button up shirt. “Tell me what you want as a reward for good behavior?”

 

 

Hanzo watched, revealing in the shaky intake of breath and the dance of muscles in Jesse’s jaw as he bit down on some gut deep instinctual reply. “What is it?” Hanzo stroked his fingers through Jesse’s hair to settle his hand on the back of his neck. “Tell me, Jesse.”

 

“I… i don’t… I want,” Jesse staggered half through a sentence and Hanzo pulled him closer.

 

Hanzo tugged the man’s hair, forcing his face up. It crumpled before his eyes, all the needy, hungry uncertainty giving way to desolation. He looked away, not meeting Hanzo’s gaze and tears welled up in the corners of his eyes.

 

Hanzo had touched on a still tender wound and he softened his grip in Jesse’s hair. He stroked against the back of his neck before letting his palm rest against it. “Tell me what you are thinking.”

 

Jesse squirmed but Hanzo didn’t let him get away. His heart was beating too fast and the flames of desire were shifting into concern. His teasing had not meant to hurt and yet he had somehow still done it.

 

“Just… i ain’t… you see a big guy like me and… I ain’t. God I’m the worst at this,” Jesse sighed hard enough to ruffle Hanzo’s shirt. Hanzo held his breath, watching as Jesse slowly set his hands on his waist. High enough to almost be appropriate between friends.

 

“I know you’re just… just doing this for the money and i don’t expect anything more. I just… you make me almost believe you’d be into me and it hurts t’know you’re not. I ain’t asking for anything. I’m happy just t’have you close and be able t’hold you but then you get in my lap and all i want is t’have’ya bend me over the table and fuck me till we spill the ramen all over the place.”

 

Hanzo flushed to his ear tips, hand fisting hard against Jesse’s neck to hear what he dreamed of. Swallowing, he tried to moisten his throat, to find any air left to breath when he was burning up inside.

 

“You… are a bottom?” The words came out hoarse and thick with his accent.

 

“Yeah,” Jesse whispered the word and Hanzo strained to hear. “Yeah. I am.” Jesse dropped his head into his hands and little hiccuping sobs shook him and all Hanzo could do was watch in shock.

 

Countless urges raced through him, shaking him to his boots as he let himself dream of another situation where he could drag Jesse’s face hard into his groin and show him just how much the idea thrilled him. He could bend him over the table like he fantasized about and fuck that fat, perfect, jiggly ass until he was sobbing with pleasure instead of anguish.

 

“Shh…it is alright,” he crooned even as he trembled. Holding himself back by a thread from taking Jesse right then and there but it would only hurt more when he betrayed him.

 

It was not right to steal a heart along with the fine china.

  
  



	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thanks Megan for sponsoring this chapter! <3 
> 
> You can find me on tumblr, insta, twitter and patreon with batkatbrown if you want to see and read more of my work!

Jesse would never forget the relief he felt when Hanzo touched him. And how it had crumbled into heartbreak when Hanzo stepped away. He had sat frozen in the chair, precum soaking his underwear from a painfully hard erection as Hanzo backed away. There had been panic in his face and horror and then he had run out of the apartment.

Of course Jesse had just sat there and let it happen. He couldn’t even ask him to stay, to talk, to apologize for not being what Hanzo wanted. Instead he’d sat like a dumb fuck and let Hanzo get away.

The numbness settled heavily on his shoulders.

It wasn’t until the sun had set and darkness fell that the panic began to overwhelm him. Hanzo had not come back. It was after nine. Hanzo should have come back. Was he even coming back? He hadn’t taken his things but would he send someone for them? Or ask Jesse to leave them boxed up by the front door.

He couldn’t even pay someone to love him.

Jesse bit back a sob, face buried in his pillow behind locked doors. He had made such a fool of himself. A sloppy, disgusting pig that couldn’t even take advantage of a gift when it was put right in his lap. The look of shock on Haku’s face might as well have been a slap. There was no misreading that.

“Fuck.” He slammed his fist into the mattress as a cry broke from his mouth. He shoved his face into the pillow, soaked with tears. It was hot against his flushed skin. “Stupid piece of shit.” He couldn’t hold himself together, the pieces raining down.

He couldn’t even get a stripper to fuck him. Not even if he paid and this time it was worse, so much worse. Hanzo had felt him, how hard he was. He’d been willing to touch him. Fingers in his hair and body flushed against him and even something that might have been real attraction.

It only made it worse.

Hanzo had been interested in him, for a second, until Jesse came clean. Why couldn’t he just be what people wanted? He had failed at being straight. Not even an amazing woman as beautiful as the art he studied could make him get hard.

Shame pressed down on him, a sickening weight on his gut and his body was cold. It was supposed to be easier to be his ‘true self’ but it was just another set of rejection and ache. He was broken, completely.

No one would want him, especially the men that he wanted.

Maybe he should shave every bit of hair from his body, get a personal trainer and stop eating all the good food in the world and slim down. If he looked the part, maybe he wouldn’t end up seeing repulsion in the eyes of the man in his arms.

Jesse dragged the blanket over himself and sank into the darkness.

 

-

 

The stone step was cold under Hanzo’s ass.

“You’re an idiot.”

“I am aware,” Hanzo sighed in response and tilted his head to look at his brother. The green in his hair had been replaced with pink in the three weeks since they had last met. “You are no better.”

“I’m the younger brother, I get to be an idiot.” Genji laughed and rested back with his weight on his elbows on another step. “And I haven’t fallen for my mark.”

“I haven’t fallen for him,” hanzo snapped and took a hard drag on his cigarette. The nicotine went straight to his head. The buzz soothed his nerves a little. The reality of his situation remained sharp and cutting. “He’s fallen for me.”

Genji shrugged and Hanzo complained as the cig was stolen. He watched his brother breath out a cloud of smoke through a smile. “So what? Isn’t that what you wanted? He’s easy to manipulate now. You’re the honeypot, just keep him out of your pants and the money will keep coming.”

Hanzo put his chin in his hand, staring at the neon lit street. Vicious pinks danced on the curves of old wrought iron right next to chrome cars. It was pretty, in the night. During the day, the street would be grungy and filthy and they wouldn’t risk sitting on the stoop. The bar behind them had been closed for months but the smell of burnt wood was still strong in the air.

Why couldn’t things just go to plan?

Hanzo stubbed out the butt of his cig and tucked it into a pocket. “How’s your job?”

“Smooth so far. Not as interesting as this handsome, chubby, well meaning art nerd who *paid* you up front and in cash. We have two thousand bucks hidden in the floorboards of our apartment left over and you’ll get paid again in five days.”

Hanzo didn’t want to talk about it. Not about the money or the job or how they might need to move on again sometime soon. There was never any chance to put down roots. He had never - not since they had fled the clan - considered where they would be in a month or two or six. Much less what might happen if he let Jesse fall in love with him.

If he let himself set a foot in that pool of happiness, would he be able to walk out of it? It was easy when the men were cruel. Even the hottest of them would show their dark side when they thought someone was weak and vulnerable and he had the scars to prove it. They had tombstones. It seemed an even trade.

“And he hasn’t even tried to fuck you right? Or get you to blow him or even get naked right? Like… dream job, Hanzo. You can’t fuck it up by getting all sentimental.” Genji chuckled and the flick of a lighter opening seemed to crack the air between them. “Just take the money, keep being his assistant and getting blackmail material, and when you want out - you got a clean getaway.”

Hanzo nodded, knowing it made sense on paper. He had never been the one to struggle cutting ties. “I don’t want to hurt him.” The words came out a whisper, easily blown away on the wind.

“Because you actually *do* like him?” Genji’s face was starkly illuminated by the pink light. It cut deeply around his eyes and turned his cheekbones to knives. “Which wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world. Just saying, this city is big enough to stay lost in. We could stay - until the money runs out. Then, well, if you still like him without the money - I’ll figure something out to take care of myself. You know I can.”

“I know the exact opposite.” Hanzo reached out to ruffle his brother’s hair. “You are hopeless without me.”

“I can take care of myself!” Genji laughed and it made Hanzo’s chest hurt.

“Then I will keep your cut for myself when Jesse pays me next.” Hanzo chuckled, climbing to his feet and dusting off his ass.

“No, forgive me. I am sorry. I need you so much, brother. Without you, I will be lost in the gutter.” Genji flopped onto the stairs, arm over his face. “Did that work? Cuz I’m getting better at playing the damsel. Really pulls in the dumb tops. Do you try that with Dr McCree?”

Hanzo froze, keys in his hand. “Jesse is a bottom. Not a top, at all.”

“Shit.”

“Indeed.”

Hanzo hopped onto his motorcycle and turned the engine over. The roar thankfully blocked out any of Genji’s teasing. He was thankful for the cold air on his skin as he wove through the streets and onto the highway. Going nowhere, he ate up the miles as if he could outrun his own feelings.

The sun was rising when he finally turned his sights towards Jesse. Empty streets greeted him. It was a relief to his tired body and mind, letting him drift. The haze followed as he took the elevator.

Jesse would be on the other side of the solid wood door in the too brightly lit hallway. The fool that craved affection so much he’d ruin himself to get it and Hanzo held the most to gain.

The burden of knowing what he had already done weighed on his shoulders. He sagged under it. He could leave now but he should have already done it if he was. The break would have been clean.

A heavy sigh fell from his lips and he rested his forehead on the smooth wood. He wanted to go in. That was the worst part of the whole mess. He wanted to fix things with Jesse. He wanted to see him smiling again.

The apartment was quiet.

Hanzo closed the door gently and locked it. It was a familiar gesture already. Pushing that thought away, he headed into the living room. The dishes from last night were still on the table. A congealed mess of noodles and broth mocked him with memories of Jesse slurping them down from his own chopsticks.

He left the scene of the crime and slunk through the apartment. There was no sign Jesse had left his bedroom and when he checked the camera feed it was confirmed.

Jesse was in the apartment and the only room left unsearched was his bedroom.

Everything ached with exhaustion as Hanzo stripped. The clothes were left like molted feathers in a trail behind him. It was easier to breathe in clean, loose clothes that didn’t reek of fear and car exhaust.

He hesitated outside the man’s bedroom door. His heart was loud in his ears, beating too fast. He pushed on, determined to face whatever awaited him. The knock was firm and quick and he didn’t have to wait long.

“Hanzo?”

Jesse’s voice was rough as if he had been shouting.

“May we talk, Jesse?” Hanzo tried the door knob but it was locked. He frowned down at the bit of metal. “I wish to discuss what happened.”

“It’s okay… you can go, I’ll still pay you for next month since it’s my fault this all… this all happened.” Jesse was closer now, on the other side of the door. “I’m sorry, for all of it and you ain’t gotta feel obligated t’stay any longer.”

“Do you want me to go?” Hanzo bit the words off, teeth catching on the last vowel. But they were out in the air now, floating between them and he held his breath.

“...I want you to stay. Shit, I really do.” Jesse groaned, the sound rough even through the thick door. “But…you don’t want me, or t’be around me. I get that. We’ll keep it… keep it ‘professional’. You don’t gotta let me touch you. Know you ain’t, ain’t into that.”

Hanzo’s temper flared. “You presume to know what I want to touch or not touch. You assume much about me and about yourself.”

“You don’t gotta pretend. My ego’s not so fragile as ya gotta fluff me up for it.” Tears were creeping into Jesse’s voice, mixing with the frustrated anger simmering underneath.

“Open the door.” Hanzo growled, quickly moving past talking as an option. Jesse was not going to believe anything he *said* when he was so deep in his self hate. That much was clear as Jesse began to degrade and abuse himself with his own words again.

Hanzo ignored it and the talk of ‘disgusting, fat, slob’ that Jesse kept pouring over himself. The door was strong and solid. The balcony one was not. Hanzo left Jesse ruminating in his failures.

Moving quickly, he entered his room and out onto the shared balcony. The city was beginning to wake below them. Cold stone under his feet made him shiver. He crossed the walk and stepped in front of Jesse’s balcony door. The curtain was mostly drawn. Only a sliver of space remained for Hanzo to peek into the room.

It was dark.

Jesse was a dim figure, half crumpled on his knees by the door.

The sliding door hissed as he pushed it to the side.

 

-

 

Jesse couldn’t force himself to stop sabotaging everything he had in his life. He had been engaged to a wonderful, brilliant, kind woman but he couldn’t make himself get it up. He’d run away from his family to keep a secret they would understand if he could only bare to tell them.

He’d failed at his first attempt at a gay relationship. He couldn’t even maintain a gay friendship without getting a hard on like an idiot and disappoint Hanzo. It would be entirely normal for Hanzo to bolt.

He was here for a paycheck. He was here for easy cash.

Jesse didn’t even care that he was being played so easily. Those moments with Hanzo in his arms, or grinding on him, or just sitting on the couch side by side, had been worth the shame of paying for it.

He should send Hanzo away but he just couldn’t bare the thought of being alone again. He couldn’t get his mouth to stop pouring out poison. All the things wrong with him from his repulsive belly and thunder thighs to his fear of being abandoned to his fear of getting back into the field again were exposed when Hanzo looked at him like he could desire him.

Clutching his left arm, he let all the vile dark things out. The metal beneath synthetic skin was cold and radiated out. He had already paid a high price for discovery. If he had only been smarter, faster, he would still have his arm. He wouldn’t have spiraled out of control. He never would have become so weak and pathetic. He was a disgrace to his field. He was worthless. He only disappointed everyone and himself at every turn.

A real man wouldn’t cry.

The hiss of the sliding door opening made him jump. He jerked to face the sudden influx of light. Squinting against the early morning sun, Hanzo’s form came into focus. Broad, meaty shoulders gave way to a sturdy chest and slender hips and everything perfect. A silhouetted angel in the dawn, it was painful to look at him.

Drawing his knees up, he hid his face in his arms across them. His stomach made it impossible to simply hide his tear stained cheeks in his knees alone. It was one more thing to make him crumple and want to run as far as he could.

 


End file.
